How to Intentionally Teach Winning in Life

Joe: 0:00

There's no shortcut. Sometimes you just gotta go through whatever those tough times are and just know that on the other side that there is a reward at the end of it.

Luke: 0:21

Really excited to introduce today's guest who's one of the most respected coaches in the state of Illinois. Not just because of his success on the field, but also due to the fact of who he is off the field. Joe Sanchez is the head football coach at Barrington High School for the past 21 years, and has been a social studies teacher at Barrington for 27 years. In this episode, we're going to discuss the parallels between being a head football coach and being a parent. How humility and effective communication and trusting the process are crucial to our success. Coach Sanchez, thanks for being on the show today.

Joe: 0:58

Thanks, Luke. It's, uh, it's an honor to be here, an honor to have this, conversation with you.

Luke: 1:02

One thing that we share in common is we both became head football coaches when we really weren't ready to be. You were named head football coach at 28 years old. "I was named head football coach at 29 years old. Knowing what you know now, if you go back and talk to the 28 year old coach Sanchez first time head football coach, what would you tell him that he needs to know to be successful in this?

Joe: 1:26

Wow. Um, probably just, uh, just two words. Be patient. I think that's probably the what "I, what "I probably could have used of when "I was a lot younger. you know, we all want instant success. We, we see all the success story, success stories, you know, of all these other coaches that are out there and been doing it a really long time. And you just think it's gonna happen. and you don't realize, the process now. "I was really fortunate, Luke. The fact that we had some success early. we had some really good teams with some really good coaches, who, fortunately believed in what we were trying to do and more importantly how we were trying to do it. But, you know, you know, as well as "I do, you can almost become a victim of your own success, where, the expectations raise, which is what you want, but "I think it's a skill to also learn how to deal with it and, and what's important to listen. and what's important not to listen to and, and not worrying about perception and more worried about the substance and the quality and what it is that we're trying to do for the boys. "I always believe that football, just like you, is a wonderful platform to help teach young men, more importantly, what it takes to become great men in society. but sometimes we can become fixated on the results because we're all competitive. but "I think, especially when you're younger, You can let that be more important. than the substance of what it is that you're trying to teach on a daily basis. And so I've been really fortunate. We're, like "I said, we've had a lot of great players, a lot of great coaches, a lot of great families that have been really supportive, that have allowed me and great administrators that have supported me and allowed me to grow. and hopefully I'd like to think that I'm a I'm a better version than "I was back in 2002. but just like you, I'm, I'm humble enough to. "I still feel like "I got lots of room to keep getting better. And, that's what, what drives me. And that's what "I love about this. it's, it's an honor to be a part of this profession, both, teaching and coaching.

Luke: 3:17

Yeah, the double edged sword of success. A lot of us would say it's probably harder once you get to a successful level than the process of trying to get up to the top of the hill. And it's kind of the irony of success. So you work your butt off to get there, and once you're there, you, you've created more stress for yourself. So Is being a head football coach become easier or harder through these 21?

Joe: 3:43

I'd like to, you know, "I "I, that's, that's an interesting question and it's a challenging one and I'm gonna try to answer it, as best "I can. "i. "I think it's hard all the time. because "I think the kids are constantly changing. Society is changing. We're trying to keep up with the trends and trying to keep up with whatever the new challenges are, that our kids are dealing with on a daily basis. So "I think in that regards. It's harder because you try to stay ahead of the curve or try to "I. Dunno if we can ever stay ahead of it, but try to keep up with the curve. but "I think it becomes And "I say this very carefully, it becomes a bit easier with experience in that because you've seen so much and you've seen so many kids before. The kids that you've had now deal with maybe similar problems and issues. Though we both know no problem or issue is ever the same for anyone or any person. The reality is, is that because you've seen it and you've had that experience, you may have something that you can draw. To be able to provide guidance to the boys, uh, and to the kids in your classroom to maybe help them. So I use the word easier only from a standpoint of experience, and that's something that you can draw upon when, when you're a 28 year old punk and you're first year head coach. You got nothing. "I mean everything is new. "I mean, it's like, you know, "I, "I, "I, like "I. Don't know that. "I became comfortable teaching till like year five or year six because everything felt like this was just moving so fast. And I'm just trying to stay one day ahead. and now with 21 years of experience, and, you know, and I'm gonna go back to a a, I've been really blessed. I've had a lot of great mentors in my career as a player and as a coach. But one. Who, who's had a tremendous influence on my life is a guy by the name of Tony Rasmussen. He was a former head coach. and when "I became the defensive coordinator at 25 years old, he was on staff and was like my mentor. And we became really, really close. I'll never forget when my oldest daughter was born, he came over to the house, he put his arm around me, like he puts his arm around everybody. And he said to me, In his southern draw. He goes, boy, you're gonna be a better teacher and a better coach now. And "I just shook my head, Luke, and of course, because he was the sage veteran, "I went, okay. And I'll never forget looking at kids differently in my c. because now as "I looked at every single kid, "I went, you are what my daughter is to me. And no matter what issues or what problems you may have, somebody looks at you the same way that "I look at my daughter. So "I owe it to them, to you to look at you that way and try and help you in whatever this path is that we're going down, whether it's academically, athletically, whatever, to try and help and so I guess that's where "I just think that experience. Also as a parent "I, think as now as "I have my own kids, and I'm going through this "I think has helped me become a better teacher and a better coach. Just like my guy Tony Rasmussen said it would years ago and "I just took it as blind faith.

Luke: 6:48

that really resonates with me. "I, "I, "I cannot agree more with you. How the greatest. Professional development "I had as a teacher and a coach was becoming a parent, especially a parent of kids who play sports. So "I get to hear what kids are saying when they get in the car, leaving my football practice. And it really is eye-opening and really it helps you to see things through a different lens. There is no no question about it, And, and yes, "I "i. Look at my players and my students. From the lens of what if this was my son or my daughter? And that's why it is so important to me to try to treat each student and player as if they were, because "I know "I want someone to be doing that for my kids, and that's a great. Segue to an article "I Read Online by 365 Barrington, and it was just interfering who you are and what it means to be in the Barrington community and being a parent. And as "I read this, I'm like, man, there are so many parallels between what you say in being a father and what we all know being a coach is. And one thing that you mention in article is you learn from being a father. How "I. Humility and effective communication are, and those are two extremely important characteristics that you need to have as a coach. And you talked about the perception as a father is you have to be strong and all knowing and "I think that's the same thing as a head football coach. My players, my staff, people look to you and think you should have all the answers in reality in both as a father and as a head football. you really don't, so you cannot rely on yourself. So from the lens of a head football coach, why is it so important to have to have a great support staff that you could rely on?

Joe: 8:44

Well, "I just think like, you know, just like you alluded to "I, "I, think it's, it's so important and so critical to have that great support network around you. Whether it's coaches, athletic trainers, administrators, just friends outside of the game that you can bounce ideas off of. And thoughts off, off of, because just like you said, "I mean as much. We may want to have all the answers or think we're supposed to have all the answers. The reality is, is that we're not, and and "I think it's, you gotta have a great sense of humility to realize that it's okay not to and "I think it's also good to be able to model that for our young. You know, young men, young women that we're, that we're trying to mentor both on and off the field because "I think in so many ways, they think they have to have all the answers and, and it's not, it's not possible. And so "I think it's an, it's an important skill to be able to, an important trait to be able to develop and be able to, to be okay with. And, and once again, it goes back to our earlier. Young head coach Joe Sanchez didn't have that. "I, "I, I'll be the first to admit it. You know, "I, when "I look back at, you know, 2002, 2003, 2004, and, and, and beyond, like in those first early years, "I "I, "I think it was buried way down there. But "I "I didn't feel like "I was confident enough or secure enough to be able to show it. and to be able to feel like "I could show that. And now, like you said, as a, parent and as a head coach, you quickly find out, man, especially with our oldest, right? We were just talking about 'em beforehand. Every day is a learning day. every day we're trying to figure something out and trying to help guide them to whatever it is, that path that they're trying to go on. And so "I do believe it's it's so important to have those good people around you to be able to help you and "I think. You gotta be humble enough to be able to, willing to admit to them, "I need your. This is us collectively, right? This is our team. so what is it that we're trying to get across? What am "I missing? What am "I not seeing? This is what I'm seeing. Do you guys agree? Do you not agree? Am "I totally missing the boat on this? It's okay. You know, "I tell the guys all the time, "I go. My ego's gone. "I "I. "I don't care. "I don't have to be. Right. "I want us to be right because "I "I want us to try and do right by our boys on the field and trying to guide them to the best possible experience. and that's right. This thing, it's, it's so important to have that humility and to be able to have those people around you that are, that also have that same humility with you. That are understanding like, Hey, "I "I know you're not gonna have all the answers. It's okay to ask me a. It's all right. You know, I'm not gonna judge you and "I think you know as well as "I. Do "I think sometimes, you know, it doesn't matter. Young or old "I. Think sometimes. Just in general we're afraid to show, like, we may not know something cuz we're afraid of what it might look like. It's, it's, it's okay. It's all right. We're, we're, we're figuring this out together. Um, and that's the, the wonderful part of this "I think that's where the growth comes in. And "I, just think once again, there are so many parallels, between that and parenting. "I, it's unbeliev.

Luke: 11:41

Absolutely. It goes back to that popular saying, once we stop worrying who gets the credit, that's when something special. Is really going to happen. So as a head football coach that "I have learned is you don't have to be this, special play caller. who cares? Let's get some other people in the room that know what they're doing and have some suggestions. And the other thing too is, you know, you'll never have the same relationship with your players as the assistant coaches do. That's just, you wish you could, but but you won't. your players are inevitably going. Have a different dynamic with your players. So they're so important as assistants because they're gonna find things out. And I'm constantly talking to my assistant coaches, guys, keep me in the loop. you know, you're like, boots on the ground for me. Tell me what's going on. So "I could address, Things that "I don't know, because if you don't know, you don't know. And sometimes there might be, you know, your players may be really beat up mentally and physically. They may have some struggles in the classroom. "I, there's just so many things that are happening that you need to know. As a, as a head football coach. So it is really important that you have that circle that you could trust because there is no way you could do it as a solo coach. Right? And that is something that we both have learned through the years because "I have definitely gotten a lot better at trusting and delegating. And the other thing that "I still really try to get better at is effective communication, which is the other thing you brought about being a parent

Joe: 13:08

Mm-hmm.

Luke: 13:09

and within being a head coach. One of the most important things we do to the whole organization, and this would be administration, parents and players, is to express what we want and why we want that. That's more important than Yex, as and O's. So how do you get that out to the Barrington High School football community?

Joe: 13:32

I mean, once again, "I, "I, like you said, "I mean to be able to get that message out there. Whether it's to administrators, parents and players, "I, just think it's always, you know, trying to meet and not over meeting, which is kind of one of those fine balances. Right. And you know, certainly we have like, probably a lot of people will have. Kickoff meeting at the end of, uh, end of the school year before we're about to start the summer, to just kind of explain the schedule and kind of explain more importantly the expectations. And then we'll have a preseason parents meeting, and then we'll meet, you know, one of the things that we still do though "I know the other coaches in the mid suburban league don't like it. And "I and "I understand why we still play our homecoming game on a Saturday. which is, there's good to. And there's bad to that, But the good is, is that it allows us to kind of bring everybody together on that night before with the varsity players and families, and we have a family dinner and it's become so important because "I just feel like it's an opportunity for us. "I just in the middle of the year after everything's gone on, just to be able to be together and just, it's an opportunity for us to be able to share, you know, share our experiences. "I know for me, it's an opportunity to talk to the parents and the players collectively as a whole, and thank them for everything that they've done up to that point and kind of. Call it what you will. Maybe a state of the union type of address. Like, here's what's gone on the first half of the season, here's where we're currently at, here's what we're still trying to do, and, and we can certainly do it. And here's what we continue to need your support. you know, so "I, "I, think all of that, you know, are ways that we try to communicate. but more importantly, "I, just think in your communication, "I think to be effective and "I think you would agree. Um, because, you know, once again, "I feel. "I "I know you, who you are as a person and as a teacher and as a coach is honest. Communication and being able to, effective communication to me is honest communication. Being able to honestly and effectively kind of say, Hey, here's where we're at, and, and here's where, yes, this has been good, but in terms of who we're playing or what we're trying to accomplish in the process, this isn't good enough. And being able. Get them to identify it and being able to get them to see that and, and, and know that where we're coming from is from the best interest of everybody. I'm very, very conscious of the language and the word choices. "I, "I try to be very, very conscious of using we, to me that is such an "I. Part of this process because it is, we, it's not "I, it's not you, it's us collectively together. And I'll try to constantly remind the boys, like if we're giving them feedback about things that we may not be doing well collectively in a certain area as a team, "I go. When, when we're sharing this with you as coaches, we're part of the shortcoming Whether, whether, whether you realize that or not, it may feel like we're just coming down on you. Somehow some way we're not communicating, we're not showing somehow, some way we're missing something to get you to understand the importance of doing it this way. And, and "I go. And, and that's where "I try to get them to understand, like, look, it feels like we're coming down on you. Whether we're watching film, we're watching the film from Friday night, we're watching Practice "I go, this is all of us. "I Go. We're all in the same boat. We're all trying to get to the same spot. and so "I think. Effective communication is honest communication, but "I also think it's also on how you frame it. and "I really firmly believe that if the kids know that you have their best interest in mind, that it is about them. It is about the team. It is about trying to get us to, to be the best version of whatever this group is possibly being, and that you also care about them. then "I think that's when the communication and the words are able. to be able to, he hold more meaning for them so that you can make those, jumps and growth and be able to continue to make progress because, you know, as well as "I do, we've been around a lot of different people throughout our career. You know, the people that are genuinely honest and care about our wellbeing and you know about those people who. It's really more about them in, in terms of what they're trying to accomplish, whatever their agenda might be, and you know, that you're just kind of pawn in their game. And look, "I care about my job. I'll do what "I gotta do. But "I don't know that you really have whatever the, the best interest is. And then, and kids can read right through that, just like adults can. and so "I just think effective communication is honest. "I think it's also, the word choices we use, but then "I also think they gotta know that you care about them unconditionally and that you care about their wellbeing more than anything else. and "I think that's what's allowed us to be able to effectively communicate and grow as a program over the last 20 plus years.

Luke: 18:04

Yeah, that honest communication piece is so important. Some people don't want to hear the honesty, but I feel like they at least will walk out. Once they have time to decompress after what has been said, they will respect you and the organization a heck of a lot more that you did lay it just, you laid it out there and that you were honest. And the other piece that is important is knowing that we are all in this together and "I like that, you are intentional with the word. and when you're standing up in front of the group, you are representing the whole high school community in that moment. And it, it is really important that everyone's values are aligned, which goes to the point of, you described your current job as a dream job. Now we have a lot of listeners that are, everyone's looking to elevate themselves and a lot of people want to be head coaches someday. What are some things. could look to when we are interviewing for a job that would help us land that dream job for ourselves.

Joe: 19:08

wow. Uh, "I think some of the traits and the characteristics are, you know, once again, "I mean there's always the strategic part, right? There's the X's and O's, there's all of that, which is important. There's a, there's a place for that. And "I think you and "I both know that. but "I also think it's as you're going and you're, and you're looking for that dream job, it's what do you see in that job and what do you see in that community that, that you can offer that you feel like you can enhance and enhance and continue to make better? And, and how are you going to help them beyond having success on the field? More importantly, having them and helping them have success. Beyond the field, what can you help to provide for that and how are you using the game, the sport, whatever it is that you're using as a platform to be able to help our young, you know, men and women, you know, in the classroom and on the athletic field, on the courts and everything else, helping them to become successful beyond. and, and to me, that's, if I'm an administrator, that's what "I want. "I "I want to know that "I "I know you can X and o. "I "I know you can do this. "I know you can teach the fundamentals. "I wanna know what you're gonna bring to our community. "I wanna know what you're gonna bring to our, to our culture. How you're gonna enhance that. What are you gonna do to make this special and, and how is it gonna help kind of have a ripple effect. On everyone throughout the building. because to me, "I think that's what's ultimately so important and, and even more so "I think in this day and age, as a as we've all in the state of Illinois been trying to come out of the, the pandemic and we're trying to reacquaint ourselves. Back to our community and back into the culture of what it means now to be within the high school and within the high school community. "I just feel like now more than ever, is it's trying to bring the kids back and having them feel connected in a sense of pride in their school and in their community. And you know, once again, "I, "I, "I. Think as as a head coach of any. "I "I. Think it goes beyond just your sport and your, little community that you're trying to influence. You know, we're really fortunate that with our sport, it, it happens to be, you know, in so many ways the premier sport of the building, right? At least that's what we strive for because it, it gains the most recognition. "I mean we only get a chance to play nine times. We practice a whole heck of a lot to just get nine opportunities to play right? And we're. that all that's gonna pay off for a 10th, right? And hopefully beyond. But we're only guaranteed nine. There's only one time we're playing once a week. And "I think that's why it's so much different than any other sport. But "I think in any sport, "I think you have that opportunity as a head coach to have that platform. And how are you gonna use that platform, beyond your sport. What else are you gonna do to be able to bring and provide for the community? Cuz "I think just as, as I've learned over time, it's so much more. you know, Luke "I, "I don't want to go off on a, on off topic here, but, you know, this past weekend was a really tough weekend for our, community. We had a, a former player of ours who unfortunately passed away, um, at a very young age. He was entering his sophomore year in college and, um, you know, "I "I had a chance to go to the wake on Friday night and at the wake on Friday night. "I saw so many of our former players and so many of our current players, cuz he's got a younger brother who's currently on the team. So many of. Coaches and teachers that are there supporting. And um, and then "I, we had a chance, my wife and "I had a chance yesterday to go to the service, and three of our former players were asked to speak and to see them at such a young age, 19, 20 years old, to have to deliver, a eulogy for one of their friends, but to do it as in such a way that was so meaningful and so heartfelt, and, and they refer back to so many memories. That "I didn't even know were memories for them as being a part of the game. Right? And, and a part of the camaraderie and the brotherhood. That's where you're reminded, you know, that what we're doing, Goes well beyond just the field. "I, "I. It's about setting them up for life and, and trying to help guide them in the best possible way and being able to cope with, with situations like this. And, you know, as "I got a chance to see some of the boys afterwards, "I said, look, "I go. Nobody expects this at this young of an age because you think you're gonna live forever. "I go. But this is part of it. and "I, go "I want you to know that we're here for you. You know, you might be in college, you might be lucky enough to still be playing here or there, but we're still here for you. "I go. So when you come home, if you need anything, I'm a text or a call away. and "I think that's where, once again, whether it's whatever sport it is, "I just feel like what we're providing for them goes well beyond the four years that they're a part of our program. and that's where, once again, to go back to your question, "I know "I kind of went off tangent, but that's what "I think you want. And, and you gotta realize is your role as a head coach at the high school. It's beyond winning and losing. It's, it's, it's about providing them the platform and, and the skills and the traits and the characteristics of what it's gonna take for them. to be successful beyond their high school experience. And um, and that's where "I feel like we as coaches in our program, you know, in, in our program, we've been able to "I think, help with that "I, we're still learning. We're not perfect. We're like everybody else trying to do the best we can. But, um, yeah, "I just think that's where, you know, like "I said, "I think that's such an important trait that, that as an, if "I were an administrator, That's what I'd be looking for. What, what do you bring into the table that's gonna give me more than just what "I know you're gonna do on the field of court or whatever athletic arena that you're in.

Luke: 24:36

There is no doubt that we have a responsibility to teach our kids life skills to go win at life. That's really what this is about. "I tell my players, Hey, if this was about wins and losses, "I would go Coach at D one or N F L. You know, "I intentionally chose to be a high school football coach. That "I wanna win. Of course, "I do. but that can't be the guiding principle because you'll be left with a empty hollow feeling at the end of the year because only eight teams are left holding the trophy at the end. So statistically the odds of us being that one team is few and far between. So how do you intentionally do these things and, and "I know, you and "I have connected before with your Champions manual, and we both have read Coach Tressel's book. I have to give a shameless plug here. "I had Coach Truss on the podcast, "I Dunno if you got to listen to that, but that was really, really cool to get to talk with Coach Trussel about the impetus behind his book, which ended up being so motivational to me. So, both of us have kind of taken that concept from Coach Trussell and have, have made it our own, within our own program. So let's talk about your champions manual and how you are intentionally teaching your players life skills.

Joe: 25:48

Yeah. first off, you know, once again, "I mean from Coach Trussel to you and to so many others who have done versions of their champions manual, "I think it's become such an important driving force because "I think what it reminds us is it reminds us that what we're doing. it goes well beyond the football field. You know, once again, it's, it's about teaching them, you know, intentionally the traits, the characteristics, and the skills that they're gonna need to be successful. And, you know, we, we did a really good job with that. "I felt like up until the pandemic and you know, like "I was sharing with you and being very honest and humble, right? The last couple of seasons because of the pandemic and then some other factors we've gotten away from it. And not intentionally, but just more just because of timing or, or things of that nature that maybe were some factors that took us away from it. But with that said, "I feel like we've still done a good job of maybe teaching some of the traits, but what "I feel like the Champions Manual has done for us, is it gives us kind of this guide throughout the year and it helps to, to ground us back on what we hold ourselves to and our values and our core values. And it's a constant reminder. It's a weekly reminder of whatever that value or that lesson is for that. This is what we're gonna take and this is how we're, it applies to this point in the season and how it also applies beyond and that's where "I feel like to be able to get 15, 16, 17, 18 year old young boys. who are trying to become men, to learn those skills are, are so critically important. because once again, just kinda like with so minutes of the conversation that we've had as a man in our society, right? The perception is we're supposed to be strong. We're supposed to be tough. You know, we're, we gotta do everything by ourselves. We don't need to ask for help. And we both know that's not the case. "I mean, yeah, we want to be strong, but being strong is also being able to. When maybe "I "I have a weakness in an area, and this is something that "I can be better at. And to be able to get 15, 16, 17, 18 year old young boys to be able to talk about those things. And you know, as well as "I do, they're not always ready for it. Some kids are just like, look man, I'm not here to talk "I, just wanna "I, just wanna play ball. you know, "I don't "I, don't get this. What are we doing? You know, but "I can't tell you how many kids have come back years later and they're like, "I, get it. And you're like, yeah, and "I "I going, and I'm not mad at you for not getting. When you were younger, because "I don't know Luke "I, if I'm being honest, "I don't know that "I would've got it when "I was their age, right? Because there's so many things that I'm more worried about than "I am right now than talking about humility or being vulnerable or talking about love, right? Like what? Like love football. What "I, what is that? What, what are you talking about? And "I think that's so important. And so, you know, and once again, to go back to being intentional, and this goes back to the manual. We talk about love, and I'll tell the boys openly like, look "I, go "I. Know this is gonna seem really weird, but each and every one of you, man, "I, "I, have a love for "I, have an unconditional love. When you choose to commit to play for this program, it's not easy. You have this vision of what it's gonna look like, but there's only 11 of you at a time. They're gonna be able to live that vision out. So we've been really fortunate. Our numbers have been big. So that means there's gonna be 60, 70, 80 of you that aren't gonna get that. right? So, so then what's the point? What are we doing? What's the grander picture? Well, the grander picture is, is that you're a part of something and that, you know, in this program, You are unconditionally going to be loved in this program. We are going to care for you and we are gonna give you everything that we have and it will go beyond. We just had our banquet, like a lot of people, and "I told that senior group "I, go, "I, go. We are here for you. Well beyond, as long as "I am the head football coach of this program, "I Go. You are a part of this, and "I go. And if you need anything, a letter of recommendation, a reference, anything, as long as it's, and "I always put this disclaimer out there and it gets a laugh as long as it's. "I, "I. Go, "I will, "I will have your back. We will have your back. And, and, and "I. And that's important. And, and then it's important to, to then be able to follow through with that. you know, and so "I, take that once again, just like we talked back and, and "I, I'm jumping everywhere, but go back to our, our kids "I. Want somebody to be that way for my. So it's same thing, "I, look at them and, and it, and it all goes full circle. and so "I, just think the Champions manual that's what it's done for us though. We haven't done it the way that we used to do it intentionally, we're getting back to it because "I feel like in the last couple of seasons, We just missed that guide and we need to get back to that. and so "I know for me, you know, and now we're putting it on air. So now "I have to do it. It's gonna be out there in the podcast

Luke: 30:30

Gotta be held accountable.

Joe: 30:31

People are gonna hold me accountable. We are, we're getting back to it. And, um, you know, and "I look forward to, you know, hopefully talking more to you about what you're doing now because "I know that, you know, you had some time away and you got yourself just recently back in. So it probably, in your mind, it's evolved from when you did it at Lakes to Lake Zurich to now how you're doing it at St. Pat's. And, and "I. Just, I'm always constantly looking to try and figure out what are, what are better ways that we can do it. And um, and that's what "I love about this profession. And that's why, you know, once again, when you reached out, "I wanting to even just do this. "I was humbled because "I "I have such great respect and admiration for you and how you've gone about doing, you know, your craft and within the classroom and, and on the field that, to think that "I might have little nuggets here and there that might be able to help somebody somewhere is, is humbling cuz I'm still trying to figure it out man.

Luke: 31:18

Well, yeah, "I really appreciate that coach. And you're right, it's about moving the needle for somebody just a little bit. And that's the definition of success. If it's, if it's just about holding the trophy, Again, I, "I. Think that's just chasing the wrong destination and talking about the Champions manual. "I. I. Don't wanna just make the assumption that people listening know exactly what we're talking about to you and "I. It makes sense, but someone listening like what does he mean about the Champions manual and weekly themes and intentionally teaching these lessons. So, For the sake of time, we can't dive totally into this, but we could at least give a peripheral of, of what you do to intentionally teach these life lessons out of your Champion's manual book.

Joe: 32:00

Yeah. So you know, what we do is we come up as a staff, like we have our core values. Then that's what we start with. That's our root. So for us, it's about brotherhood. It's about holding each other to the standard of being the best, the best that we possibly can, both on and off the field. It's about believing and it's about battling. So those are our four. You know, if you ever watched us playing, you ever saw our helmet logo? It's the horseshoe bee. And so those, that bee represents the brotherhood, holding ourselves to our best standard, believing and battling for each other. And so that's where it starts. And so, you know, we'll take one week or two weeks where we're just gonna focus on that particular value. And then, you think about every year, how every team is different, how every season is different. you might have a particular theme or a particular, belief or thought of what you think this team is gonna need to be successful. So you come up with other traits or characteristics or. Maybe it's a book read, you know, that's gonna guide you throughout the year, "I, whatever it might be, to be able to help guide you throughout the season. We started, uh, without diving too far into it. We started in the summer, you know, that's where, you know, we usually go, we'll, we'll take a, we'll take a trip to, to n "I U and that's where we introduce it because we've got 'em isolated by themselves without all the other outside distrac. And we get them an opportunity to be able to get together and start talking, and then we use it from the preseason all the way through the season to wherever our season might end. Certainly like you and "I, we're both planning and the hope and the expectation is, is to be playing on Thanksgiving weekend. So like "I, tell the boys the calendar's set, we've got it, we've got a plan to get us all the way there. It's just a matter of, can we execute it well enough and be one of those last teams standing? But whether we get to the end or not, wherever the season end, We've got a guide and a plan to get us all the way through to that point. but it's time, it's effort, it's preparation. It's also having your coaches on board with it. because it's time consuming for them. Not only do they gotta, you know, be doing, you know, whatever it is, if it's a coordinator, be worrying about the offensive or defense or a special teams game plan, or you know, a position coach on what "I gotta do to implement that week, but, It's doing that little bit extra for that weekly LE lesson that might be you or, or leading that conversation with your, your position group on Thursday night before the game, you know, to make sure that you're still having those meaningful conversations. Um, like anything, it's always best when the boys are leading it. Um, "I think we would all agree that it's, uh, it's always more meaningful when the players are bought in and they're doing it. And "I think, you know, once again, every group is gonna be different, but "I, "I, "I think sometimes we can't allow. To dictate whether or not we think this is worth it because it is. Because "I think if it's only gonna be about X's and O's, like you said, if it's only about holding up the trophy at the end, well it's then it's a hollow journey. You know, "I, "I, "I, "I. That's not what it's about. It's about so much more and, and "I think that's what the Champion's manual, at least from my perspective. In terms of how we've done it, has been able to provide for our boys. And that's why "I just believe it's so important that we get back to it. and not that we've had a hollow journey the last two years that we haven't done it. "I wouldn't say that at all, but we just haven't had that weekly guide to be able to give us that structure, which "I think is so important. Um, and that's where "I get excited talking about it because "I miss it and "I want to get back to it.

Luke: 35:18

Yeah, and talking about that guide again, we're talking about an actual book that you produce to your players that they are going to work through, read through with you and the coaches, and to the point of the assistant coaches, they have to realize, This is going to take away from the football field and you have to be okay with that. And "I "I, try to be very transparent with my football coaches. yes, we're gonna take practice time away and we're gonna do this instead. And you have to be okay with that. If you would rather just focus on the Xs and O's. This is probably not the staff for you and you are absolutely correct and it's way more meaningful when the kids take control of it. What are some things you have done or you have seen just happen organically where the kids do take control of your champion's manual, of a weekly theme of one of your meetings on a Thursday night?

Joe: 36:11

Yeah, so, so what we've tried to do over the years and in the years where it's been really special when we've had this, when we've had the kids bought in, is we've had the kids take our core values and we'll identify leaders that we think are coming back and we'll have them teach the lesson. So we'll take like, say our four core values and we'll take two senior leaders. You're teaching this value, you are teaching this value, you are teaching this value, we assign 'em. And so then they're in charge and then they have to lead the meeting at the end of the week. And so you put them in that ownership position and now they get a chance to kind of, what is this to me? Now they gotta think about it and how would "I present this? And then what we've also done is we'll take homecoming week and we've taken homecoming. And because we have an extra day, we'll also give our captains, because sometimes our captains aren't, you know, as well as "I do, right? You've got your captains, but you've also got guys that are leaders outside of those guys that are captains. And you know, some years it might be our captains, some years it just might be, Hey, these are guys that have emerged as leaders in the group of our team. We're gonna put them in charge of this homecoming week, this value, this tradition, right? That they're gonna be in charge of talking to the team this week. Uh, whatever the, characteristic or the trade is, or the lesson is for that week and you know, so once again, "I "I think that's what we've tried to do intentionally by design to give them more ownership. Now, once again, you know, that's, it's easier said than done cuz you know, as well as "I do, it's just like when you give presentations in the classroom, there's some kids that go up there and that are prepared and they do a really good job and you're like, yes. And then there are some kids that come in and, well, let's just say maybe they're not as prepared. Like, okay, all right. But, but that's part of it, and that's what you have to be willing to accept, and that goes back to a commitment. That goes back to being humble and vulnerable, like, you know, as well as "I do. As coaches, we're all control freaks, we really hate giving up control. Right? So you've gotta be willing to give that up. and just like you said earlier, "I mean that's an important, such an important trait as a head coach. For any future head coach or any future leader of any organization, as much as it is you, you have to be willing to give up to allow others to grow. And "I think that's where it's so unique and "I think that's what we've tried to do intentionally, to answer your question, to give them leadership and to give them ownership of it.

Luke: 38:41

To wrap up this interview, "I, want to go full circle and go back to that article? "I referenced 365 Barrington and. One of your players "I, think it might have been Scotty Miller, who obviously well known playing the NFL now, which is pretty awesome for you. but one thing that he said, and some of your other players echoed in that article is they talked about characteristics of who you are as a person. And there's three that really stood out to me and it was loyalty. And optimistic and "I. Don't know if you could have three better characteristics to describe a successful coach and teacher than that. So congratulations that your players recognize that about you. But "I have to ask you a really tough question if you have to pick one of them. Loyalty, honesty, or optimism. Which one is the most important? We know they're all important, but what would you take if you only could take. That would help you be successful in the classroom and out on the field as a coach.

Joe: 39:44

Wow. That is a tough question. as "I sit here and "I right off the top of my head, "I lean towards being optimistic. "I just "I think so much of as the leader of any group or organization. When times are dark, there's gotta be a ray of light somewhere. And "I think when you're the leader, when you're up on whatever platform that you're on trying to lead whatever group that you're trying to lead, there has to be that, that hope, that belief, that whatever we're struggling with, that there is, there is a way out. There is a way to, to get through this, you know, and, and it's kind of like what you and "I were talking about before, you know, prior to the interview. "I think so much of our struggles right now in education right, are just trying to reacclimate our kids back to. Accountability and for, you know, to, to some of the, the, the expectations and the way that they're supposed to behave, final exams, whatever it is. And we know that some of our kids are struggling with it. Like right now we're, we've got a week and a half and left in the semester and "I, look at my kids. I'm gonna look at my kids tomorrow and I'm gonna see the weight of the world on their shoulders. And so as "I look at them and they feel like I'm never gonna get outta this and they're not gonna be able to get through "I, have to remind them that. You're going to and, and you were gonna get through this, but the only way you're gonna get through this is by you being in the moment right now. Right? It's "I. Can't worry about the future because the future is controlled by what you're doing right now in this moment. If you think you're gonna tackle every single issue that you have right now, right here, you're not. What you have to focus on is what we're doing right now in US history or civics or whatever it is, and then next hour when you go to English or chemistry or. Well that's when you have to focus on that. And, and "I think being able to, to provide that, that plan, that purpose, that way of them being able to see that, look "I, "I validate whatever struggles it is that you're having. But that there is a way out "I think right now. "I. Think maybe just I'd lean towards that because of maybe just where I'm at right now in the semester. you know, in terms of just dealing with that. So, "I "I guess that positive outlook, that positive mindset, that giving them that hope and that belief that they can get through it. But, I should be getting a plug from UA on this, right? Under Armor their slogan. The only way is through "I. "I mean, and that's it In so many ways, "I mean there. There's no shortcut. Sometimes you just gotta go through whatever those tough times are and just know that on the other side that there is a reward at the end of it. but you just gotta go through it and you gotta, you just, there's just no way around it. Like, you know, there's "I, it just takes what it takes. You hear Coach Saban and those guys talk about that all the time. Like there's, there's just a certain way that things have to be done. And, and so "I guess, just being able to provide them that positive outlook and that optimistic outlook. "I guess would be where "I, where "I guess "I would lean right now on December 11th at, uh, roughly 10:00 AM in terms of, you're asking me that question.

Luke: 42:45

Yeah, that day-to-day, trusting the process is critical for the long-term success of our students and our athletes, and it's something that in society, people really struggle with because we're in such an instantaneous society. And yeah, I, "I. Love that you picked optimism because that was part of the platform of creating this podcast. "I just feel like everywhere "I turned was just negativity. And one of my favorite m l k quotes, and this isn't the quote exactly, but he, he said, only in darkness can "I see the stars. and "I just noticed during Covid "I, "I got caught in the quagmire of negativity. And I'm like, what am "I doing? And as "I started to learn about social media and "I started to learn about, it was more cause "I was worried about my kids. And "I saw how was negatively impacting them. "I started to realize that we have to control our inputs and that is something we all can do. We don't realize it, but we can. And when we do, we'll have a more optimistic outlook. So, uh, "I, "I could spend a. Episode on Champions Manual, "I could spend a whole nother episode on optimism. So I really love that you brought those aspects to our episode today. But like you said, it is a Sunday morning and we have to get on with our fatherly duties, which is where we started talking about this. So we have to end it here. But, uh, as always, "I "I really love connecting with you, I think we are very much aligned with what our true mission, our true calling in this profession really is. So thank you for all that you are doing to our profession. Thank you for all you're doing to impact the students at Barrington High School because that ultimately impacts. The Greater society as a whole, and thank you for being so generous with your time on the Sunday morning, and best of luck with the end of the semester and moving forward in your coaching career and your teaching career as well.

Joe: 44:35

Thank you Luke, and, and thank to you for, for doing this "I. Think, uh, "I think this is such a great outlet for, for teachers and coaches and, and to be able to hear, you know, so many different perspectives on, on what we can do to continue to get better. And so I'm thankful for you to take the time to do this. So thanks for having me. It's, it's an honor to be here.