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April 26, 2022

How to Live by Design w/Rob Cressy

How to Live by Design w/Rob Cressy

#38. Today we have a special show - one that will hopefully have you will walk away feeling more positive and motivated to finding your best version. This episode features Rob Cressy who is a coach, speaker, and entrepreneur. More than anything Rob is a positive force for good, which is glaringly evident throughout this recording as we discuss many topics, such as mental toughness, seeking out discomfort, living a life by design, and why we need our process to be easy, simple, fun

Resources from This Episode:

Rob's website
Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink
The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday
The 5am Club by Robin Sharma

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Review The "I" in Win on Apple Podcast or my website to let me know what you think of the show.  Follow me on Twitter (@LukeMertens)

Transcript

Luke:

This is episode 38 of The "I" in Win podcast

Rob:

I am a force of attraction. I created that and I've got a series about 20 statements that create who I am every single day. And I speak them into existence. I feel into it and I visualize it. So it creates the most powerful version of my.

Luke:

Today we have a special show for you. One that I guarantee, well, maybe I shouldn't guarantee. I feel very strongly that you're going to walk away feeling more positive and motivated to finding your best version than ever before. This episode features Rob Cressy was a coach speaker, an entrepreneur, more than anything though. Rob is a positive force for good, which is clearly evident throughout this episode. As we discussed many topics, including mental toughness, seeking out this comfort, living life by design and why we need our process to be simple, easy and fun. If you enjoy this episode, please share it. The spreads of a Rob's drip, which sounds a little odd, right? Novel, make sense by the end of this episode. And if you want to learn more about Rob visit his website, RobCressy.com. And with that buckle up and be ready to challenge your own narrative and go find your best version Okay, Rob, welcome to The "I" in Win podcast. Appreciate you being on.

Rob:

Luke. Thank you for having me super excited to be genuine with you. Um,

Luke:

Well, we were connected through my neighbor, Brian O'Neill who we all know was a yinzer like you and through getting to know Brian, I've been very intrigued with the culture of Pittsburgh. You see, because I'm born and raised in Chicago and us from Chicago. Believe that everything in Chicago is the greatest. But I think I've met my match in Brian and overall just users. You've lived in bolt cities. Who's worse. Or are we really just the same in Pittsburgh and Chicago?

Rob:

What I would say is. Both can be equally great because the word greatest is something that we can all take on. So there's not just one best city in the nation. And for me, I was raised in Pittsburgh and my dream was to live in Chicago. I Love both of them. And Luke what I wrote down of why is Brian like that? And why are you Yinzers like that? It is because Pittsburgh is the city of champions and there's a mindset and way of being that comes from being around championships. And it's something that Chicago has as well from the Chicago bulls to the black Hawks, to the white Sox, to the Cubs, and then in Pittsburgh with the penguins in the Steeler. And there's a standard of excellence that comes from Mario Lemieux to the Jerome Bettis. Isn't Troy Polamalu is of the world to the Sydney Crosby's to the Patrick Keynes, to the Michael Jordans in the Scottie Pippin's and we, as fans learn to appreciate excellence and what it takes to be great. So therefore we raise our standard. So our leaves are better than everybody else's because we're used to being better at everything.

Luke:

Love your answer, Rob. And when I asked my neighbors that same thing, they don't put it as poetically as you. So thanks for sharing that. And one thing that both our cities really do pride themselves on and definitely exude is mental toughness. And a lot of people question where society is today in terms of mental illness. In your opinion, are we just not mentally tough anymore as a society?

Rob:

No, it is, it's easy to be comfortable because comfortable is sitting on your couch and watching Netflix. The challenge is nothing great ever came from your comfort zone. And I'm somebody who specializes in getting comfortable, being uncomfortable. So by design, you have to have something inside of you. Your why that say. Why do I want more out of my life to contribute for myself, my family, the community, as a whole. So most people do not seek out discomfort by design, but guess what? That is one of the biggest flaws you can conceivably have, because we all know that life is more like a roller coaster. It is not linear. Every day is not puppy dogs and rainbows. Two years ago, we woke up one day in March madness didn't exist anymore. And then neither did the NBA And no one saw that coming. However, we know that there are going to be a series of obstacles for the rest of our life into perpetuity, whether it is sickness relationships through our families, global pandemic. Whatever it is, there are going to be tough times. Therefore, if you want to be someone who lives your best life and is a champion, you want to specialize in adversity in getting comfortable, being uncomfortable, AKA mental toughness.

Luke:

as you know, I'm a coach and many of our listeners are coaches of various sports, and that's a really important attribute of a champion athlete, getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. How do we specifically take our young athletes and teach them to, as you say, seek out discomfort because I feel like they avoid it.

Rob:

It is done through experience. And there's two ways to do this now share from my personal experience, we can go on the micro side of things. So one of the things that I learned from Tony Robbins is the power of cold showers. And of course there are actual physiological benefits that it. speeds up your metabolism. And it helps ward off sickness. However, what a cold shower does for me is that a micro dose of courage, because 100 times out of 100, when I turn that water under freezing cold, it is uncomfort. So many of us would like to say, would you like more courage in your life? And of course we would, but does that mean we're going to send it a four way intersection and wait for an old lady to try and cross and for us to be like everybody stop, I'm going to be courageous and work on courage now. No. So how in the world do you build your courage? Well, you can microdose courage as simply as jumping in and taking a cold shower. And then when I do. I, I think about myself as a lion because all right, if I'm going to do cold showers or in the form of athletes, you're going to do the cold tub. You can go in and you can whimper and you can allow yourself limiting voice to make the noise. Or you can sit there and say, what would a champion do? And I envisioned myself like a lion roaring rawr, boom. I go into that and I create myself. So boom, you can easily microdose courage or mental toughness just by jumping into a cold shower. On the macro level. What I did to call debate mental toughness is I completed Andy Frisella. Seventy-five hard mental toughness challenge, and he actually has a year long mental toughness program called the live hard program. And it is a program designed to turn you into the best version of yourself by essentially putting you in positions every single day, to do things that are uncomfortable in the name of mental toughness.

Luke:

Well, another thing that you talk about is balance, which is really important. I've heard, you said create more time for the things that. you get to do what you love every day. I get to do what I love every day. And the negative to that is we tend to be all in and we tend to lose life's balance. For example, being a good father and a husband, because we're so in, on our careers. assuming you found that passion and your job, it's just not a job. it's a true calling. How do you create that balance in your life? How do you find it? Or is, the word balance out there appropriate?

Rob:

I don't believe balance is the appropriate word, because you're never gonna balance is not part of my. Because I've got different ways to frame exactly what you say because, and this is sort of going to be applicable to everything else that we talk about moving forward, but we all get to control the narrative of the story in our head, whether it's mental toughness or being from a city of champions or anything. You can control what it is that you say to yourself. So for me, I believe in living a holistic life by design. So one of the quotes that changed my life when I learned it was live by design, not by default. And what does it mean. And Luke, you actually, um, briefly talked about it at the very beginning with people being comfortable and not really looking towards mental toughness, but I'm someone who does not believe in living by default, AKA waking up every day and just going through the motions, not being purpose-driven and not living a life that you love on the flip side lifestyle by design. By design says, all right, what are all the things that are my non-negotiables the most important things in my life. My health, my wealth, my love, my happiness, my family. All right. I am going to design them into my day. Sure. I love helping people. Sure. I've got a job and there's things that I do that being said most important thing in my life, my family, you know, what else is most important? My health, my love, my creating. So I don't believe in balance and I don't believe. Uh, not having things part of my life, because if something is important enough, you will find time to make it happen. And if you don't, the story you're just telling yourself is my job is more important than my health and Murphy family or golfing with my friends or whatever it is. And that is just a trap because excuses are not going to create what you want in your life.

Luke:

Let's talk about control and the narrative that you mentioned. negative self-talk tends to permeate within our own head. And I agree with you. We do control our own narrative, but it's very difficult to fight off that negative self-talk, especially in today's world where we tend to be very comparative to other people. And a lot of people put us down. So how do we control that narrative despite the negative self.

Rob:

So number one in Luke, uh, I'm someone who is a master of language. And what I mean by that is I am very intentional by listening to every single word that someone says. And I'm also very intentional about every single word that comes out of my. Because you can speak things into existence. So, Luke, what you said is it can be difficult to fight off that the negativity in the world while I understand that that is also a perspective because one of the things that I teach my clients, I often say, Well, what would this look like if it's easy? So we will work on something that someone wants to call it debate. So I want to cultivate kindness or being better on video. And I'm like, all right, let's create a 30 day challenge where once a day, uh, you're going to be on video and you're going to post it online. And the client I'm be like, oh man, that's going to be so hard. And I'm like, wait, stop. What is it that you just said? It's like, yeah, it's going to be a hard, I've never done this before. I'm like, there's the problem right there. You spoken to existence before it even happened that this was going to be hard because what if you took the narrative that controlling the narrative in your head is easy. So that's the first place that I would start. Because number two, it is easy. And you know why? Because you just want to create a process for yourself to remove the negative and replace it with the positive story. And this is very simple to do, and I'm going to give everybody this gift right now in this can change your life. So when I started my entrepreneurial journey over a decade ago, I went down to making $0. I had no relationships, no websites, nobody knew what I was doing. All I had was this dream of working in sports and being creative. So I sat there and I'm like, all right, what is going to help me accomplish my goals? Faster, positivity or negative? And the answer was positivity. Of course, negativity doesn't serve me. And it's going to take me further away from where I want to go in. It's going to slow me down. Therefore negativity has no place in my life. Look, you understand this? You're a coach. Boom. That has no place in my life. We're not going to win. If we're going down negativity, therefore negativity is a zero in. So when you say, all right, it's all around the world. Well, it's not for me because negativity is a zero. I'm the leader of team. Good vibes. I live a life of positivity because I know negativity isn't going to help me accomplish my goals. So now I'm not consuming the news. I don't jump on social media. Right. When I wake up, I'm very intentional about my inputs, the things that feed. So now you say, all right, well, how do you create positive? Self-talk in a world of media that is designed to be negative and fear-based, and self-limiting compassion. Well, you want to create a process for yourself. So I have a self cultivation practice of creating who I am and what it is is a series of, I am declarations a series of statements that create who I am every single morning. So I'll give you a few examples of these. The first thing that I. I am infinite love in the queue. This is step one. I speak into existence. Step two, I visualize this and I feel Intuit. So I think about my son and my wife and living in Florida and how in love I am with everything. And in the infinite love I have for my own self in the love I have for the world and the love I have for coming on Luke's podcast. And boom, I feel this emotion in that anchor. Good. I've anchored in infinite love. And then I'll say I'm a force of attraction and there's a picture of a diamond there. And I think about myself radiating like a diamond. So anything good that comes into my life. I created that whether it's your podcast or I got a good parking spot at the mall, or I found $20 on the ground, a lot of people will think, oh, that's just something. I am a force of attraction. I created that and I've got a series about 20 statements that create who I am every single day. And I speak them into existence. I feel into it and I visualize it. So it creates the most powerful version of my. 'cause Luke when the rest of the day goes on, I already know who I am because I've created the narrative in my head of the best version of myself and I rinse and repeat this every single day, because I know the second that I step outside, it's going to be nothing but arrows from the rest of the world. Comparison, TV, social media, you name it. They're coming for my attention in my mind, but guess what? I already know who I am, cause I've already created myself. Plus I know that negativity has no place in my life. So I am in charge of my own self talk. And when you understand this, you can say, wait a second. I can create myself into any version of myself that I want Luke, just like we said at the beginning, both Chicago and Pittsburgh can be the best city in the world. Just like I can be the happiest person on earth. And so can you.

Luke:

So let's talk about those affirmations. Would it be inappropriate to mentioned, I'm the greatest coach or I'm the best teacher on the best day trader? Is that be inappropriate? African.

Rob:

So I want to give one key distinction here. There is a difference between an affirmation in a declaration affirmations while good. And I did them for a large majority of my life until I learned about declaration. Oftentimes affirmations are words, people read or speak into existence that are positive. That say, Hey, I'm the best coach in the world. Hey, that's, that's absolutely fantastic. But a lot of times people, one don't believe them or two, it is a future state. So, uh, I am going to have this Lamborghini and boom it's, it's good to keep putting it out there. So this is not a negative. This is a next level that I'm telling. So people, they put it into the future, but the thing that will be unlocking your potential is we, when you understand you can and be, you can be in our, all of this right now. So this is the power of I am. So Luke, I am the world's greatest coach. Boom, take that on right now. And, and think about this. Like you're standing on a mountaintop in affirmation, oftentimes it's good, but you stand on the mountain and you're like, I am the world's greatest coach and there is feeling and emotion and there's power in. And you sit there and that might not be the record because you might be taking over a team that went, oh and 11, but you're the world's greatest coach because of the way that you show up and the way that you support and you turn yourself into the best version of yourself and you say, you know what? I am a champion for everyone, including every single one of my players. And I know I am the best for them because I am giving them everything. So it is part of your being that you show up as the world's greatest coach. So in that instance, yes, you can create that. And then you go through that and out encourage, these are not just business-related things. So I'll give you a few more examples to help with this. So I am forgiving. Wait, what? Yeah, I am forgiving because I want to be someone who can forgive myself first. Remember Luke, we talked about how our inner critic can be self-limiting and negative. Self-talk boom. I want to be someone who forgives myself quickly for my own judgments, as well as forgiving others and boom. That is a great thing to call. Um, as I mentioned, I am the happiest person on earth shining my light on everyone in Luke. When we started this before you started recording, you're like, Rob, I know you're all about positivity. That is by design, my friend, and everyone has the option to show up as the happiest person on earth or the greatest coach in the world. I can do it and you can do it. It's choosing to take that on. Here's another one. I am fearless. And I sit into this in what unlocked this for me was a quote and I'm paraphrasing from Michael Jordan. He's like fear doesn't exist in me because I know the work that I've put in. And I was like, oh my mind exploded because I've been on this journey for. More than a decade slash 40 years of my life. So I know everything that's coming to this. And then number two, I'm intentional, sorry. Read the book, the power of intention by Wayne Dyer. So I know when I'm showing up, I'm doing that with intention. What is there to fear when you know exactly what you're doing? And then number three, fear is a choice. It's a state of being, I'm not about that life. This has no place in my life. So therefore I am fearless. And you can create these emotions and states of being in yourself that create you into the powerful version of yourself. Does this make sense?

Luke:

Absolutely. And at the end of the day, it goes back to the word you mentioned process. And I know, I believe in process as much as you do. I think every teacher and coach believes in process growth mindset, but the reality is. today it's a results driven world. So let's talk about that group. We're working with high school age kids. How do we help keep them focused on the process? Because in my 21 years I've been in education. I have definitely seen a shift. Let's take a weight room. For example, I know you're into health and fitness kids walk into the weight room and bam just expect to be at their goals. They don't understand that it's going to take years to get there. So how do we help athletes to stay focused on the process in a world that is so driven by results?

Rob:

So I wrote down three words and my answer for this is the same answer for every one of my clients. And when you take this, it can change your life. Easy, simple, fun. So number one, what would this look like? If it's easy? All right. We want to make, um, working out as a team. Easy. All right. Well, how about we make it easy for them to execute all of that look like, give them a sheet of five things to do. As a team simple. So we're not going to make this overly complex on them. So focusing on the micro, not this giant thing and then fun. So for me, let's turn this into a competition. So the second you said the weight room, I thought about something like an sec football weight room, Alabama, LSU, Auburn, Georgia. They roll in there. And men, it is a competition. They go in and they're hungry because they're doing that. Not only for themselves, but they know they're playing Alabama or LSU or Georgia next year. And they as a team build this comradery. So the fun and the competition are built in by design. And they know that this is a journey, but all of those things, there needs to be a leader for that. And I would be someone that leads by design as a coach. So, boom, you always see these strength coaches that are all jacked, but they go down there. Boom. They go ahead and crush it. And then I would also say, go ahead and find the leader on your team, even if he's 14 years old. Boom, put that person in a leadership position and have them help rise other people up, give them some love and say, listen, I know you're a leader. I know you have greatness inside of you. I want you to help us lead this team in this weight room. You're going to be better. They're going to be better. Are you up to that challenge and boom, now we've got ownership of it because one of the things that I speak to clients of mine who want to launch a podcast, are you interested or are you committed? Everybody's like, oh, I've thought about having a podcast in the last year or two. I'm like those people aren't going to be working with me. I want the people who say, Rob, I have something inside of me that I've got to get out of me. I want a podcast and I'm willing to do anything for it. Boom. That person's committed. So ask your students and players, are you just interested in this or are you committed and then create that culture?

Luke:

Well, looking at your website, Rob cressey.com. I saw your eight values that I really enjoyed. I'm going to talk about the one value in particular, which is talk with candor. And I completely agree that that is a, that's a really important value in my profession. We have to speak, as you say, from a place of honesty and come from a place of intense. However, it is easier said than done for a multitude of reasons. The reality is, and you used the word about 10 minutes ago. We do live in a society that tends to compare and sometimes cancel things that we don't agree with. in my profession it is political and we have to be really careful what we say. You're an entrepreneur, your own boss. I am not. So how do we navigate those? Sometimes treacherous waters of, we want to be honest and open. But we do run the risk of getting ourselves in trouble with that honesty too.

Rob:

You want to think about where you're coming from first in Canada doesn't always mean. If you see something, you say something because sometimes, and we certainly know this as husbands with wives and families that you don't always speak everything that's on your mind, even if you see an opportunity to fix something. So I use that as the analogy in the same way, because we don't want to get in trouble with our wives. Therefore, sometimes you just say, you know what, maybe I'm just going to take this one. For the team. it really comes from where you're coming from. So step one, let's talk about framing the way that you can frame something. So maybe in your candor when you're like, Ooh, could this get me in trouble? That's an opportunity for you to say, all right, what is a way for me to reframe this in a way that can I put it on me? A great book around this is extreme ownership by Jocko wellness. One of my favorite. And you can always come back to yourself. And even if they're the ones who are tripping and they're not doing things correct. Um, you don't want to put yourself in a position where your leadership has compromised. But you want to be someone who comes from love and it doesn't mean you can't have tough conversations, but this is once again going to come to culture because you look at Nick Saban, boom, this is the way that things are done. So why would the way that Nick Saban does things be any different than. Well, he makes all this money and things are a little bit different. I get it. But that's a story that we're telling ourselves. If you're a master of language and you're someone who always comes from love it's an opportunity for you to really be there for them. And sometimes you want to have that tough conversation, but can you give me an instance in which. You would get yourself in trouble to where if you set it, that that would be the detriment of the student or the player.

Luke:

Yeah, I don't think it's ever to the detriment of the student or the player, but it's a sensitive topic that sometimes parents struggle with. And it's really difficult sometimes for parents to hear the truth about their son or their daughter, even when it's out of a place of love.

Rob:

I mean, I know this isn't the, the answer that everyone would be looking like looking for, but that's their problem. And I get it in dealing with high school athletics and things that people are going to have a variety of different opinions, but. You're going to be there first for your team and for your players. And remember Luca at the top, when you talked about why are people challenged by mental toughness? So It's unfortunate that you're now coaching in this environment, in which the people you want to speak candid too, are also the same people who are not mentally tough and who are not about this life that maybe they keep up with the Joneses. Maybe they're about comparison. Maybe there's entitlement. There's all of these different. But those are all stories and you're not going to please everybody in for me. The number one thing for me is myself, my family, and those that I'm accountable to around that. So the parents, while I get that, they're part of this to me, they're on the lowest rung of this equation because they just aren't.

Luke:

So another thing that you're really good at is building a brand. You're an entrepreneur and you help a lot of clients build their brand. And I told you before I hit record that I have recently come to terms with building a brand. I find. Never been a big fan of social media. It's like, it's very self promoting and being a coach of football. That's like the antithesis of what we're trying to do within football. However, now, We really do all build a brand, even if it's intentional or not, because that's our reputation at the end of the day. At least that's what I see building a brand as, am I completely off base on this? I mean, aren't we all in a way building our brand, regardless if it was 1920 or current.

Rob:

So Luke, you are not alone in that way of thinking, but once again, listen to this story that you told yourself, social media is self promoting. That's just the lens that Luke decided to create for the world. Right? That's how I'm going to live into all of that. And I think back to when I was the MC of a marketing conference in New York a few years ago, and I'm standing on stage and we're doing Q and a, and this woman raises her hand and goes, why would anybody care about what I have to say on a podcast? Which to me is a very similar thing to this. You know what the answer is? If you have something inside of you that can help even one person, it is your duty to share it with the world. So, Luke, what I would challenge you to say is to reframe self-promoting to helping, because you're making this all about losing. But guess what those who are the best, they make it all about everybody else. What does Luke the coach know that can help those parents who can't handle my candor? That's where there's an opportunity. How could Luke social media be so good that his players in players from other teams are on there because you're teaching lessons about life that can be applicable to. So for you, I encourage you to think about what you have inside of you that can help other people. And one of the things that I write down every single day on my journal, it is what would infinite love creates. Imagine Luke, if you showed up every single day on social media and you asked. What would infinite love create man, the infinite love version of Luke. There's so many things that you would create. And then the next part of this, about the 1920s to now. So there's two key fundamentals to brand building from a mindset standpoint, write these down because these, these just changed my life. Number one, everything you do. Is a reflection of your brand from the clothes that you wear to what you say to how you show up to what you eat, because it says something about you, a brand is not just social media. Everything you do is a reflection of your brand because a brand is who you are. And number two, and Luke, this is the part that I really want you to listen to. Everything you do is an opportunity to create a positive brand interaction. Because think about that instead of self promoting, it becomes helping in positive brand interaction. So now. The parents are saying, oh, I can't wait until Luke posts his motivation Monday, because it's a way for me, I've got something going on in my life that I need some help with. And Luke's my dribble, positivity or transformation Tuesday. This is coach Luke. Here's an opportunity for you to do one good thing today. That's going to make you better. Here it is. dot.dot. And this is your opportunity where boom positive loop, positive loop, positive loop doesn't mean you're always positive. It's just a positive brand interaction. So now when people see Luke, they're like, whoa, I love Luke's brand because he's helping me. He makes my world better. And I look forward to hearing from him again.

Luke:

love it, Rob. I wrote it down and I hope that this podcast is exactly what you're talking about, because it's exactly the place from where I started this from. I just wanted to share a positive message. And I know that there are times that I needed to hear something positive from somebody else to kind of keep me moving. And that's why I did this. And that's why I wanted to have a guy like Yuan. Cause I do think that's important to give those messages of positivity. And again, like you said, that becomes your brand. So I hope that is the brand of The "I" in Win because that is the place I wanted to start this from. And I do think people are finding that positivity. So thanks for sharing those points and uh, you know, redirecting me. I do have a written down, you could see my piece of paper right there. Rob, I've got all my notes written down. I'm doing it.

Rob:

So look the first off, thank you for taking action. Number two, there's another perspective that I want you to, uh, understand. And a lot of what we're talking about today is going to be circular or apply to each other. So once again, lots of negativity in the world, right? Comparison, self limiting, beliefs, fears, boom. The world is on their agenda. But now here comes a drip, a loop, and imagine for every 10 negative posts. Here comes one positive loop post. So now you become a positive force for good in the world that combats that negativity just by doing this and imagine how much positive impact you can create. That is not what the rest of the world is doing. So if you think about the impact you yourself can create juxtapose it based on all the negativity that's out there. We're going to be sitting there at. to 10,001 to 50,000 ratio, like some insane number. So for me, I anchor in that, that my one positive post does the work of 50,000 negative posts that boom, I'm getting rid of that.

Luke:

Part of it is a word that I know is important to you and that's the word believe, right? We have to believe that that one positive post that drip from Luke, which I love that by the way, is going to have that impact. So, and again, this is really important in life, but especially within my listeners, so many whom are. How do we get people to believe in themselves? Because that is such a struggle for teachers and coaches.

Rob:

I would just speak from my own experience when I left my corporate job and I was at 12, 13 years ago and went all in it, living my dream. Left the comforts of a well-paying job to go all in on my own life. And I looked at what entrepreneurship statistics said, the idea, and I'm paraphrasing the average entrepreneur, 80% of them fail within the first year and 90% within the first two years and 98% within the first three years or some insane number like that. And I looked at that and for me, I was all in on my dreams and I am, so I saw quitting as the only thing that I need to not do. If I don't quit, then I'm still on the journey of living my dreams and making it happen. Therefore, I was like, what would make the most sense for me to quadruple down on and you know what that. My belief in myself, in my dreams. And it's so important. I tattooed it on my forearm, the word believe. And I'm not someone with tons of tattoos and I did so as a constant reminder to always believe in myself. And if I can set my mind to something, I can make it happen because I know that failure is as simple as quitting in guess what? Quitting and failure that's comfortable. It's easy to do because the number of days in which do I feel like given. Or everything's not gum well for days, weeks, months at a time, of course. So all of this growth and development that you hear me talking about is by design in the face of adversity that I knew what was going to be there. I also knew I wasn't going to be there. So the thing that I needed to specialize in and everybody else does is belief. And here's the thing. Belief is just a. So at any point we can all choose to believe. And I think about the journey of the Stanley cup, which I arguably believe is the best and the hardest championship in the world to win, whether it's the Blackhawks or the penguins. And there's this belief amongst the team and amongst the fans, and it just grows stronger and stronger and stronger. So what you want to do and how to get people to believe in themselves. If you want to feed that belief, you want to pause. You want to feed that positivity. And one of the things that I love that I've learned that I teach and coach. Is when speaking about your vision, which to me, your belief comes into your vision. It is not about how it will happen. It is about putting the vision out there, visualizing it in believing it will happen. You don't know how, and you don't need to worry about that. Do not worry about the, how instead focus on the vision. So the way that I get people to believe in themselves, boom, microbial. Feed that belief and put that vision out there and anchor in that vision.

Luke:

One thing that we both agree on is Ron. This journey to become a better version of ourselves, be better today than we were yesterday. What are some steps we can take to monitor that?

Rob:

number one, you want to be intentional about this? So for me, it's all about creating the. I've got a morning routine, I've got an evening routine, I've got a shower routine and you want to design growth into your life. And for me, that starts from the second that I wake up until the second that I go to bed, because one of the biggest gifts I ever received that I would love to give everybody else is self-awareness. I'm going to keep saying over and over again, when I started my entrepreneurial journey in, why do I say this? Because it was transformative to my life because I went from somebody who lived by default, where I worked hard, played hard and made good money, but I wasn't working out. I wasn't holistic. I didn't have a morning routine. I didn't have any of these things that you're talking about now. I had to learn them. And when I went to zero, I sat there and I was like, all right. No one tells me when to wake up what to eat, when to work out what to read, what to watch, what to do anything. It is 100% on me and that's when the little light bulb clicked. I was like, it went from, oh my God, it's all on me to. Oh, my God. It's all on me. That the weight of, oh my God, this is too much to wait a second. You're telling me I get to design all of this. It's like black and white to color. So with this. All right. Well, time is my most valuable asset. How am I going to use in create it? So now let's be intentional about every single area of my life. And now let's start to design this. So you say fitness. All right, what do I want to do for fitness? How do I want to create this? When is this going to be meditation, reading, learning, journaling gratitude. You name this? So the answer is you create a process. Then it becomes a habit and a routine, and then you rinse and repeat this daily.

Luke:

So here's the struggle and this is kind of a. I really struggled with this, Rob. I have to be honest. I have some players throughout the years that never miss a training session, right. So we always say, step one is showing up. And then it's what you do once you show up. And there are definitely some kids that I've coached through the year. That show up but they're not driven to be their best. They are there because their friends are there. They are there for the social aspect of it. What do we do with those types of kids? Because I feel like many teams have them.

Rob:

Well, number one, understanding the why. I mean, it's very important because if they're there because their friends are that's okay. Because that's a normal thing in that environment. But what you want to do is to create triggers or connections to something. So what is the higher purpose? What is the vision? What is the mission so that you can take him from I, or one to many? one can be himself or one can be the team and his friends. So what I would want to create is, is there an overall mission? For the team had written down mission statement or a purpose statement. So for example, my purpose in life is to be a positive force for good. That leads others to what's possible. So is there a statement that this kid can anchor. And then from there, it's about the building of hip him in making him part of the community and part of the team. So you leverage the fact that he's there with his friends, you say, all right, well, maybe we create new friends with him that are part of the leadership group that want to work out because sometimes these kids probably have never been challenged or given the opportunity for great. And I think about some of the social media things they'll see on Instagram of a high school team where one kid will squat 500 pounds or something and everybody just going nuts. Well, how can that be created for that individual kid? Does he have a vision statement for himself? Can we anchor in his, why can we elevate his greatness? Does he have a roadmap that's individualized to how he can be great with his friends and all of this by design purposeful, intentional supportive community vision. I, we, boom. All of this comes together. To create a culture of love and support to really bring him up. Does that make sense?

Luke:

Yeah, absolutely. And I think I know what you're going to say on this, but brought up posts on social media, the kids squat, and 500. A lot of coaches have been having debate about those types of videos and the value of them. And again, going back to that word of self promotion, there's been definitely this pushback in the coaching world that are trying to get kids understand, just go do your work in the dark, so to speak, right. Just, just go to work and you don't need to put out there that you're squatting 500 pounds. What are your thoughts on that? Where you stand again? I think I know where you stand, but I'm just curious to hear.

Rob:

both. And. So, yes, you do your work in the dark at the same time. I do believe in social proof, social accountability, and you're also dealing with a new generation of players. So you need to think about what is the motivating factor for them, because. I think too, the number of players who build their brands like Lonzo ball, when he got to UCLA, he had more social media followers than the entire UCLA athletic department. So now these players are becoming bigger than this school is that they're working. But as we're dealing with the younger players, I don't see that as a bad thing because that can become a carrot for him where I want to do that. Imagine if you created a program of growth around that, to where it is used, not only to show him some love, but it to inspire others to hit their own PR. That's Hey, sure. It could be posted on social media, but maybe there's an internal thing there at the same time. do your work in the dark? I mean, that's just DNA. That's part of showing up. So you can't expect that everything you do is only going to be held. But at the same time, if you told me that there's a kid, who's posting every single one of his dead lifts on social media, I'm going to show you a kid who's getting better. So there's a story that we can tell ourselves where both can be true. It's all a matter of how you want to leverage it and potentially use that care.

Luke:

So you've already referenced some great, resources. I like to go a little bit deeper in that as we wind up this conversation or what are some great resources for personal professional development that you could put out there for our listeners that they should take a look at. If it's a podcast, if it's a movie, if it's a book, what do you have for recommending.

Rob:

I mean, I've got a plethora of resources. Number one, I host a podcast called best year ever, which is a podcast designed to create your best year ever. So if you liked this conversation, this is about the habits, routines, mindsets, and ways of being to create your best year ever because your best year ever is actually your best month ever week, ever day, ever moment. Best year ever as a lifestyle, it's a thought process. It's a way of being. So here's some books that are some of my favorites that will help you along on your journey. Number one, the obstacle is the way by Ryan holiday. And this is a book about, um, specializing in adversity. This is one of my first books that I read into my favorite. Because it says, what stands in the way becomes the way you want to be someone, whether you're a coach or a player that specializes in seeing a challenge in what may limit others, you see as the opportunity, because that's how greatness and champions are born. So the obstacle is the way by Ryan holiday. I mentioned extreme ownership by Jocko wellness. That book is absolutely fantastic. Uh, there's a book called the 5:00 AM club by Robin Sharma. Super good there. Um, those are three book resources. And actually, if you go to Rob cressey.com, I've got so much that can help you. And actually I've got one specific resource go to Rob cressey.com backslash. And I have a guide to create a morning routine that serves you. And what it is is I share my step-by-step process for how you can easily create a morning routine that serves you in the good news is you get to design it. All I give is the framework to say, Hey, here's what I'm doing. Take what you like, implement it for you. What you don't. Remove it, but sometimes you just need someone to show you the way. So Rob christie.com backslash morning, and then once you understand this, when you create a morning routine for yourself, I promise you it will change your life forever.

Luke:

So I need you to give us our mic drop right now. The reality is within many schools, at least within the circle I taught. A lot of teachers and cultures are feeling overburdened, underappreciated. morale is definitely down within our schools right now, and of all places that we need positivity, I would argue it's there, Our kids today need positive leadership. Maybe now more than in the history of our country. I at least I would argue. So can you provide some motivation to our listeners who are teachers and coaches that they are important? They can't give up on their journey. We're losing quality teachers and coaches at exponential rate. Right now, give us some.

Rob:

Own yourself, own your story. And when you said overburdened and under appreciated, I get it. I feel it, but I would like you to throw that in the trash, because that does not matter. What you can control is how you show up every single day. The story that you tell yourself, because you have the ability. To have a positive impact on not only your life and your family's lives, but so many other people's lives. And when the rest of the world in this school district is feeling this negativity and this overwhelming this under appreciation, this is your opportunity to shine for you to lead by example of the way that things are. Remember my. To be a positive force for good. That leads others to what's possible. You can be that example of what is possible. And you're like, I have no idea how in the world to do it. Cool. Near the, to die. I am building the airplane, flying the airplane and selling the air. All at the same time. And you want to show up every single day where you look forward to the opportunities that you have in front of you. And if you don't feel that you say ding, ding, ding, this is an opportunity. Wait a second. If I'm not feeling the way that I want. Why is that? Am I feeling judgment? Resistance, self Luning, beliefs. Self-talk all right. Step one. Can you forgive yourself and see your innocence in this? Cause you wouldn't consciously wake up every single day is saying I want to feel overburdened and under appreciated. No, that's dumb. Throw that in the trash step two, let's create the positive version of this because the truth is.dot, dot. Fill in the blank. You know the best version of yourself. So here's an exercise I want you to do. I want you to take 10 minutes, set a timer on your phone, remove all distractions. And I want you to write down all of the best things about yourself. I am and then fill in the blank and just go, do not edit yourself in create the most powerful version of yourself. And then what I want you to do is to read that every single day and speak that out loud, and then tell me after one week, one month or one year, how things have changed, because I promise you amazing things will happen. It is inside of you. I believe in you. And I know that great things are going to happen.

Luke:

Man, Rob, I love this episode. I had a lot of fun. I don't know if you're available. I could. Can I call you every morning? Can I make my call to you? Part of my morning?

Rob:

Crazy. You can follow me on social media everywhere at Rob Cressey sorta comes full circle, Luke. So how in the world do you get a drip of Rob the same way you get a triple Luke? Follow us on social media at Rob cross.

Luke:

Outstanding. Thanks. And how do you feel about it? A little drip, a Mitch, going to be wearing the, uh, the black and gold this fall.

Rob:

A drip of Mitch is better than a drip of Mason.

Luke:

So it's, uh, to bring us to a close It's pretty ironic because I've mentioned how my neighbor big yinzer obviously loves the black and the gold. And, he's always said, man, I would take Mitch Trubisky in a heartbeat. I love that Mr. Bisky on my team. Here we go saddle up and I'll be honest. I'm, kinda on pins and needles. Cause you're going to need to do a wellness check on me, Rob. If Mitch goes out and lights the world on fire, because I don't know if I'd be able to handle that.

Rob:

I'm rooting for him. He's mobile. He has a good pedigree. He has a good head on his shoulders. So remember the narrative around Mr. Comiskey that it's done by the media and bears fans. So everyone wants to say why Mitchell Trubisky is not the answer, but guess what? Mitchell Trubisky is about to get the opportunity of a lifetime to lead the best organization in football to the next super bowl. And he can do that despite what everybody else says about him. So that sort of is apropos for everybody that. think about how much negativity is attached to Mitchell Trubisky. But then here comes a new organization that says, I believe in you, Hey, he gets that opportunity. I'm going to root for him because why would I know.

Luke:

I agree with you. I think that Mitch is going to have a very successful career in Pittsburgh for whatever. I mean, there's a multitude of reasons. It just did not work in Chicago. Many of which are at the fault of the organization itself. So, appears to be a great guy. At least he says all the right things, his teammates have always spoken highly of him. So I'm with you. Despite the fact, I don't want the Steelers, the wind, just in spite of my neighbor. I do want Mitch Trubisky to do well. So good luck to the Steelers this fall.

Rob:

Thank you very much, Luke.

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Rob Cressy

Creating Coach

Rob Cressy is a Creating Coach whose purpose in life is to be a positive force for good that leads others to what's possible.

His work helps you design your best self. Spanning the worlds of personal growth & mindset to brand building & podcasting, his unique approach creates a roadmap to freedom and a life you love.