New Episodes Released Every Tuesday!
Nov. 1, 2022

Preparing Athletes Today w/Marsha Frese

Preparing Athletes Today w/Marsha Frese

#51. Coach Marsha Frese, Loyola University Women's Basketball Assistant Coach, has over 20 years of coaching at the D1 level. In this episode, Coach Frese discusses:

  • 3 P's
  • Being an empathetic coach
  • Toughness of today's athletes
  • Balancing being a coach and a mom

To sign up for weekly notes from each episode, CLICK HERE.

Review The "I" in Win on Apple Podcast or my website to let me know what you think of the show.  Follow me on Twitter (@LukeMertens)

Transcript

Luke:

This is episode 51 of The "I" in Win podcast.

Marsha:

Before you can really coach 'em and help 'em get to their best selves is you've gotta develop that relationship with them and, and that, empathy of, of where they're coming from to understand why they who they are.

Luke:

Hello everyone. Welcome to season two of the The "I" in Win Podcast, episode one featuring coach Marsha Frese of Loyola University in Chicago, Assistant woman's basketball coach and now is well I, shouldn't say back home. "I should call. You are from Iowa originally.

Marsha:

"I. That's correct.

Luke:

So you coached with Coach Guth originally, or you did coach her at University of Illinois. That's why you're kind of back home in Chicagoland.

Marsha:

Yes, and I've coached at both University of Illinois and Northern Illinois. So "I, you, you weren't, you weren't wrong. "I, feel like I'm back home to some extent cuz I've spent a lot of, lot, a lot of time on the, the Chicago Interstates looking for talent.

Luke:

So in addition to your personal relationship with Coach Guth, what else brought you back to Chicago?

Marsha:

Yeah, that's a great question. Um, you know, "I, "I sum up, this experience and how "I got back to Chicago in Loyola with Coach, which Coach Guth, with a thing "I heard on a podcast years ago. Um, and it was, you know, a, a guy in a podcast talking about the three P's in your profess. Life, people, purpose in place. And you know, I've been at eight different schools in my career and, on this podcast they talked about, those three things have to align for you to be someplace that you wanna stay. The people, do you wanna be around them? Do they match your value system? Are they people that you wanna be in the trenches with? The purpose is usually the institution. And does that match your value system? Do they wanna win? Because believe it or not, not every place you go to really values winning and excellence and just the place from a geographical point of view, is it near family? Is it someplace you can see yourself? Is it someplace your spouse or partner, can get work? you know, so the, the three P. Are really, really hard to find in a professional, uh, setting. And Loyola Chicago was, was it "I? "I haven't had the three P's and it's entirely my whole career. I've had pieces of 'em, haven't had all three, but the three P's were in place and, and this is why we decided to, to make this home again.

Luke:

You mentioned you've been both an assistant and a head coach. What's the major difference between being an assistant coach and a head coach?

Marsha:

Oh wow. Um, it, it "I a hundred percent. It's the relationships with the kids. And "I say that, um, not because as a head coach, you can't have great relationships because "I know when "I was a head coach. That was my, my, my main why. That's also Coach Goose main. Why? It's how the kids and the parents. View those relationships. So you literally can be the same person. And you know how this works. One day you're an assistant on a Thursday, you're a head coach, but the perception of who you are in that chair changes and it, it impacts the relationships and how they view you. So, um, obviously you're, you know, "I, "I, think at least the division "I basketball. You know, "I think as assistants you actually get to coach more, you get to work directly with the kids more. cuz as a head coach you're spending a lot of time doing a lot of the extra outside of the scenes. And, uh, Allison and "I laugh some days when she's been really busy doing a lot of the administrative side of, of her position. I'll walk by her office and go, and that's why they pay you the big bucks and "I just head on down to the gym and go work out a kid. So it's uh,

Luke:

"I. Get that one all the time myself, for my assistant.

Marsha:

Yeah, there's some pros and cons to it for.

Luke:

So before we hit record, we talked about the realities of being a male coach versus a female coach. And "I told you that I'm able to see the downloads of each episode that "I produce. And it's interesting to me that when "I do have female coaches on my downloads, don't hit the same mark. And, and that tells me, and I'm just making assumptions that "I probably have a predominantly male. They may not be realizing the value and what they can learn from a female coach. So what can a female coach help a male coach to?

Marsha:

Wow. "I mean You know, "I, "I, I'm not sure if you, if you're really a student of the game. Um, you, you'll realize that great coaches are of on every level, on every gender. Um, every staff I've worked on, I've had relationships with the male coaches on those staffs, on the other staffs, and they're stealing from us as much as we're stealing from them. So, you know, at the college level, they get it. They, they're not seeing that, Oh, they're female coaches. They don't know what they're talking about. They, they know. Studied the game, and quite frankly, female coaches are extremely, extremely detailed. Um, if you wanna e everything from, if you wanna know how to run a visit from A to Z or. Put together a scouting report. Um, the detail, the level of details at times that female coaches bring to the table. It could be extraordinary. Coach Guth "I, Thought "I was Type a, "I Am Type A coach. Guth is type a plus plus. Um, you know, and, and that. Translates into efficiency and into how we do everything. So there's a ton to learn. Um, "I think that you can also learn a ton of empathy from women, female coaches. not that male coaches don't have that empathy, but they, they. Message it very differently. And having coach high school boys a few years ago, um, you know, there were times that they, they needed that, you know, swift kick and there were times that they really needed to hear like, Hey, it's gonna be okay. You're, you're doing a great job. Just keep working. Um, so "I think messaging is a huge part of what they can learn, from female.

Luke:

Well, thanks for your honesty and that "I know it's a tough question to, to bring up, especially, uh, 9:00 AM on Sunday morning. So thank you for your honesty.

Marsha:

I've coffee. We're all good.

Luke:

So this is the first time you and "I have ever really met and "I found you on Twitter. You're a really great coach to follow at Coach Fries as your Twitter handle. And one topic matter you tweet a lot about is youth sports. And I'll let you interpret your own meaning of youth because everyone has a different lens when "I say youth sports. one thing that "I struggle with is how do coaches balance. Having fun with the realities of the demands of winning in today's.

Marsha:

Yeah, "I mean "I, "I. Think we we're all kind of getting back to that. Um, especially post covid of understanding. It really is not life or death "I it, it's career, life, or death. but when the kids are having some level of fun, they, they're gonna have success. "I mean "I. Think in the height of c when we were deemed, uh, essential personnel on college campuses. We heard a lot about that we needed to basically entertain because times were challenging for people, and so athletics was a means of entertainment. It's an entertainment purchase. but "I, it's, you know, I've often said in my kid, my career to student athletes, You know, just because it's my full-time job doesn't mean it's yours. they are there to be more than just an athlete. They, they've got a lot on their plate as students as well. and "I think, you know, as, as, as "I learned as a student athlete, when the care of the student and the person isn't. It's really difficult to be the best version of you as an athlete. So it's not really just about having fun because you know, as we often say, happy is not a sustainable, you know, "I hear a lot about, Oh, "I just want my kids to be happy. Okay, well, happy is an emotion that comes and goes throughout a course of a 24 hour period. What we want our student athletes to be is challenged and prepared and taken care of and nurtured. Yes, we want them to be happy too. Um, but we want them to come out of this experience knowing that they've given everything they can, but they've had a whole experience, not just an athlete, in a particular setting.

Luke:

I love that. Happy is not sustainable because parents really struggle with that. "I mean. We talked about the realities of us being parents. It's, it's really hard. To not, when your kids are not happy and they come home dejected after a practice, or maybe they didn't do as well on a, an assignment, it's, it's really hard, but you're correct. Like those are the moments of, growth in life and one moment of growth in life is playing time. And that's a really tough thing to juggle as a coach because for me there's this driven coach profession side of me and like you said, we have to win or we. But then there's also that human side of me, and you have athletes who do everything correctly, but maybe they're just not good enough. So I'm gonna ask you a tough question. Maybe you don't have a definitive answer to, at what age do you think winning Trump's development and what "I mean by that is, you know, if you're in coaching six year old soccer, let everybody play and let's just develop 'em and get 'em to learn and enjoy the game. When does it become a point where "I need to just play my best people and, and go out and win?

Marsha:

Well, certainly at the college level, um, you're Absolut. Playing your best people. "I mean that's it. Absolutely. Um, but "I but "I think it's kind of a misnomer to say that it, it has to trump development. Um, winning is, is certainly up there, but "I "I think what we don't put side by side in parallel with that is, is the just overall enrichment of a student athlete. Um, you a college athlete, if you're doing it right, at least from my opinion. Whether you play or you don't play, the experience around all of it should not look that much differently. Um, you know, you, you shouldn't, prop up certain kids just because they score the most points. If you have student athletes on your team who are dedicated to the team as, as a whole, dedicated to their. Development and what they're doing there. Um, certainly you're gonna have student athletes who get praise, um, from outside entities for what they bring to an athletic field. But the experience off the court shouldn't be that different, um, from the starting player to the last kid on the bench. "I. "I mean "I feel as coaches. If, if that is the feel, you're you're doing it wrong to some extent. And, and I'm not saying that's easy. You know, when you're in that top five, top seven, you're getting a lot of external praise. Um, that may, may not even be coming from the coaching staff. So you really do have to work to make sure that, the other individuals on that team, if they're not getting those accolades on the, on the sporting field, see it from somewhere else. But we, we put too much value on, just who's in that starting lineup, you know? And now as we get into, uh, you know, a couple more years of covid years with student athletes, "I mean you essentially have high school kids coming in 17, eight year, 18 years old, competing against 22, 23 year olds. Like, and if that's how you're making your comparison, "I mean you're gonna lose every time. "I mean, that's like saying a five year old should have the same skill development as a 10 year old. If you, if you really back it up and think about what happens in the space of 4, 5, 6 years, if you logically think about it, in most instances, a freshman would never take. The job of an upper class and it's just too big of a gap to overcome. So we, we measure metrics a lot. Whether it be from a running standpoint, a shooting standpoint, whatever it is we're measuring because we want them, our student athletes to be comparing themselves to them because in most cases, they can see growth. Against themselves. And that's where the, the confidence continues to build because they're like, Hey, "I am making progress. Maybe I'm not making progress against a 23 year old, but against the freshman fall version of myself, "I, I've made huge strides.

Luke:

"I fully agree with that and "I think it's getting tougher and tougher to keep athletes focused on themselves. "I always talk about pring and "I. Use the track analogy with my football players and it, it's just getting so tough like there. "I don't know if it's social media, "I don't know what it is. But they're so worried about not only what their teammates are doing and, and the positions they play, but you're talking about kids in other states sometimes in this comparison game. And also you brought up a 17 year old competing with a 22 year old. I've also noticed that no one wants to wait anymore. "I mean I'm a high school coach. I'll have freshmen telling me, What do "I have to do to play varsity? I'm like, Whoa, You know, like, Hold on a minute. You're, you're 14 and you think you're gonna come beat out a 17 or 18? And they don't have that grit it seems like. And "I "I understand. This is a broad paintbrush I'm painting with, but I'm assuming you're seeing that at your level as well.

Marsha:

A hundred percent. And you know, "I, "I, I'll put it back on the parents. You're, you're right about the grit "I. I've watched it with my own kids. I will say "I "I think nowadays, grit is developed later and later in life. "I had an issue with my son when he was. Eight and nine years old, uh, working through math. And, uh, you know, his teacher said, Well, he just doesn't have that grit, so we're just not gonna elevate him to that next level. And "I said, Listen, if you're expecting grit from an eight year old, you, you, you're gonna be shocked when you find out. They don't really develop it till into their twenties and thirties. but "I think so much of it is framed by. the messaging they hear back home, you know, "I, I'm gonna age myself here, but you know, when "I played in college, "I had a dorm room phone, and "I would call my parents every Sunday. So if "I had a problem on a Tuesday or Thursday, chances are by Sunday it was already solved, or "I had solved it myself. Um, now when there's a problem, they call home and, and that's inherently not the issue. The issue is what are they hearing on the other end of the phone? are you supportive? Are you framing it? Are you understanding, how much time it takes to be good at your craft? Um, you know, so it's really important for parents when that phone call comes to, to help their students, to help them understand you gotta be patient. It takes time, it takes consistency, and you know, you can do hard things, but you have to allow yourself the time to be able to accomplish those.

Luke:

"I Love it. And "I, I'm on board with alignment between parents and coaches and "I try, but "I also feel like it's very much out of my control. Do you have any tips for me or for any of our listeners to how to help better align the vision of the program and the head coach with? The agenda. "I hate to use the word agenda cuz it's a negative connotation, but the parents

Marsha:

Wow, man. If "I had solved that problem, I'd probably have bottled it by now, right? Um, "I Don't know. "I mean probably the most transparent thing "I think we do. You know, you've probably seen on Twitter, we have a lot of open practices. Our, our practices are wide open. Come, come one, come all. Um, Coach Guth is, it means that even to our. We have parents who come to practice and, you know, we don't change what we're doing. no matter who's in the gym, um, we might stop and teach a little bit more, but our, we've had parents come in at the collegiate level, watch practice, see what their kids are doing, and, and "I don't know if that's where it's going long term, where you've gotta have that open door. Um, you know, for us it's, it. "I think it's been very successful and positive just because we are who we are and we're at the stage of our career that you know it, there's nothing there. You come in and come see. but it's tough. "I, I'd like to say that "I parents who played at a higher level, um, maybe understand it a little bit more, but it's kind of 50 50 of whether they, they truly do understand that. But all "I can say is "I is, there's nothing. Happening for your student athlete if the support at home is not there. And by support "I don't mean telling them, Your coach doesn't have a clue and you should be doing this. What "I would say is encouraging your student athlete to come into your coaches' office, your assistants, your head coaches, whoever that may be, and have dialogue is the first step towards solving every problem because nine outta 10 times the convers. I've had personally in closed door meetings with student athletes have always ended better than they started, um, where we got closer to being on the same page where we understood mindset. Um, you know, as the, the gap widens between the age, age of the coaches and the student athlete, you gotta close that gap. And communication is the only way to.

Luke:

Yeah, and really what we're talking about is being coachable, and, and that's, that's tough, right? "I mean it's, it, and "I don't, I'm sure "I wasn't coachable my entire life as well. "I like to you know, lie to myself. Like, Oh, "I always listened to my coaches, but I'm sure "I didn't. Right? "I mean It's just kind of the nature of the age group that you and "I both work with. So, How do we help develop coachable athletes? "I mean that's, that's really tough, how do we get him or her to understand that we're trying to help develop them as a whole person? And although it's tough to hear the criticism, it's all to me about helping them reach their potential, their goals in life. Again, I don't think you have the magic formula though, cause we're all trying to, to do this, but what tips do you have to help players become more coach?

Marsha:

Yeah, no, that's a great question. Well, "I, you know, "I, guess my only, um, you know, a thing that's maybe helped for me over my career is, is understanding that before you can really coach 'em and help 'em get to their best selves is you've gotta develop that relationship with them and, and that, empathy of, of where they're coming from to understand why they. Who they are. you know, years ago when we would do more home visits, uh, when "I was coaching with my sister Brenda, we would go into home visits and, you know, within a half hour of sitting in a kid's home, so many answers of the world were, were shown to us of why a kid was the way they were, how they grew up, and how they developed. You know, I've been very transparent over the years. "I am a white woman from Iowa. "I had two parents who were married for 63 years. "I have been beyond blessed and fortunate in my life and my upbringing. "I "I. Cannot fathom at times, where certain kids come from and the schools they come out of in different places, how they've gotten to a level of where we, we meet. So "I "I try to have a tremendous amount of empathy that "I will never walk in your shoes. "I have never walked in those shoes. And there are some student athletes I've coached over the years. are just remarkable of how much they have to overcome just to get to ground level. Um, so knowing that history and knowing where they come from and, and their history and, and the things they've had to fight through to get to where they are. "I do understand that they're some days gonna take two steps back to a step forward and understand. "I "I think more than anything, people look for consistency in their. Are you a consistent presence in their life? When it's good, when it's bad, and when it's ugly. And if they know you're gonna be there, they're gonna allow you to coach them as time goes on and you just "I, "I. I've got, as I've gotten older, "I, play the long game. I'm, I'm very consistent and the kids know I'm very consistent. And so over time they will allow my me to coach them because they know I'm always gonna show up.

Luke:

You mentioned walking into a player's home, and suddenly things make a little bit more sense, and it's the same thing for me. I'm rarely shocked. Both positive and negatively when "I meet a player's parents. So you brought up the word empathy multiple times in your last response. Why is it so important for coaches to be empathetic and being empathetic does not compromise toughness, right? So where does empathy come into play here? Why is it so important?

Marsha:

"I "I mean, it's just a, as the landscape changes, "I, "I, think as coaches, we, we wanna stick to, Well, back in my day, it's kind of a running joke in the office back in my day. So much has changed in even just the last 10 years of what student athletes are processing and, and "I think I'm, you know, more equipped than some just because "I have a 17 year old daughter. Who does not play sports, by the way. but "I watched her go from fire drills to active shooting drills when she was six. And she's never known a life without social media, even though we held off on a phone until she was in ninth grade. "I mean we cannot even process as adults right now. how much layering has been put on these kids, whether it be from social media to. The school drills they're doing to the pressures they feel, um, "I don't think we can even process it, because it wasn't a part of our lives. so to say that, oh, it, it shouldn't matter and it does matter. It does matter. Um, they feel it every single day from different angles when things have become so normal to them that this is just part of their new life. Um, you know, and the comparison, "I mean high level student athletes in men's basketball and men's football. You know, you see kids miss a, a field goal and, you know, 10,000 rabid fans are in his Twitter. Telling him he's a awful human being, that that's not normal. But it is normal for these kids. And so, you know, "I always try to keep in mind that, you know, these are kids, before they're anything else. And if my daughter was an athlete and was handed off to a coaching staff, "I would hope they would always value her as. Child as a person, as somebody's daughter before the basketball or the athlete of them ever was risen to the surface of who they were.

Luke:

Do you think the realities use the example of someone missing a big kick or a basketball player missing a big shot? Do you think the realities of them knowing that they're going to like their failure is gonna be on public display? Has that caused athletes to be more cautious and not as willing to kind of put it all on the line? Like that's one thing "I struggle with as a coach. Sometimes "I feel like my players are playing it safe. "I think they're sometimes afraid to just put it all out there because what if it's not good enough? Or what if they fail? What are your thoughts on that?

Marsha:

Yeah. And "I think from the lens of a collegiate coach, I, "I see kids all the time putting it out there, because they do want to achieve at the highest level. It's the outcome after they put it all out there and it. It doesn't, it doesn't work in their favor that particular day that they feel the impact of it. You know, "I, "I tell kids sometimes that, you know, listen, we, we failed when, when "I was playing two, we failed. Or, you know, we, we got out into the world and we weren't having, you know, instant success, the differences. We didn't have to compare it with anyone. We would talk to a couple teammates on the phone, Hey, how's your life going? Oh, not so great. Oh, great. Mine's not either. We didn't have to watch it on a scale, uh, of seeing it through pictures and, and through social media of, Oh, my life's going great, even if it isn't. So athletes at the, at the college level, they're, they're programmed. They're wired to wanna achieve and when they make mistakes, we all the time we say it in practice, you didn't go out there to make a mistake. Correct? Of course, they didn't go out there to make a mistake, So, as a coach, we're simply framing for them, Hey, listen, we know you're given your best effort. Now, from a, a tactical standpoint or a, you know, technical standpoint, we're gonna teach you how to do X, Y, and Z, but nobody's going out there to fail. so we really see them dealing with the outcome of that failure less than, them trying to play it safe at this level. They're, they're, they're given all of it. They're trying to put all of it out there. Now they're having to deal with the repercussions of what if it doesn't work?

Luke:

You mentioned the ongoing joke in the coach's office of, you know, Hey, back in my day, and, and we are all guilty of that. So what you just explained, today's athletes, to me, it sounds like it's really tough, maybe even tougher today. To be an athlete than it was back in our day. There's my air quotes for those of you that can't see. So what are your thoughts given where you're at in your career? Are athletes tougher? because there's definitely a narrative that they're not as tough as they used to be. What are your thoughts?

Marsha:

Yeah, "I mean "I. Think it's super siloed. As far as like, are they tougher? "I, "I. Think when it comes to the world in general, they're, they're the whole picture of their life. I think they are tougher. "I "I kids today. Kids today, There's my air quotes kids today. College athletes today are doing more than they've ever done before, and I'm looking from the lens of, of college basketball. College basketball, kids, especially at the D one level, have no off season. they have no Thanksgiving, no Christmas, no spring break, no fall break, no winter break. There is no break. And back in my day, we had our summers off. We worked, we, we did other things we weren't worried about. Um, you know, was somebody else getting an edge? Um, we were able to have complete lives. so were we more prepared back in my day? Because we were allowed the space to do more. Yeah, maybe you could make an argument for that. But we weren't dealing with year round playing. We weren't dealing with rankings when we were in sixth grade. We weren't dealing with, how is your team travel compared to my team? We weren't dealing with any of that. and then you throw in a, a nice global pandemic and all the things that surround them as human beings. We were dealing with any of. So yeah, as student athletes, "I, think they were a lot tougher than us on some, on some level.

Luke:

And is it better or worse that there is no off?

Marsha:

you know, "I don't, "I don't love it. You know, we, there was a day when we were, uh, none of us had summer access in particular. and we were all just fine. We all just lived our lives and we were all just fine. Is the product getting better because of summer access? Is the the player coming in at a higher level? Are they going out at the higher level? Of course they are. But at the end of the day, if part of your job is to prepare them to be, the student part of student athlete, we've got some work to do. Um, because, you know, at a lot of levels, we're not allowing them the space to, get internships anymore and to get some life experience. Um, again, my daughter's 17 years old. she does not play. in high school alone, she's had three jobs, uh, summer jobs where you know, you learn to fill out the paperwork and learn what your social security, She's had more jobs than some of our college athletes. So at times you have to ask what, what are we preparing them for and how are we doing it? And what is our role as coaches in that preparation? and quite frankly, "I think we can do.

Luke:

We talked before HitRecord about being a parent and also being a coach and kind of merging those two worlds and it's, My kids love that I'm a head coach, but "I know there's moments that they don't love it. You and "I talked very openly about that. Has it been tough on your kids, especially being a head coach at the division one level? I'm sure they've had to hear, hear some harsh criticism of you at.

Marsha:

Yeah, and I'll just be honest so people can hear it from this side, you know, so my daughter's 17 now. She was, uh, 7, 8, 9, 10, that kind of age bracket when, um, "I was a head coach and she doesn't play sports and "I get a lot of people who say, Oh, do you, does that, is that. Is that a bummer that she doesn't play sports and you know, she'll come back around type thing one "I always tell 'em. No, it's not a bummer. It's amazing that she doesn't play sports because I've gotten to see a side of what it looks like when you have kids that don't, um, and how much time they have to work on. Whatever they're passionate about that isn't sports. But I'll tell you "I, I'm not, uh, I'm not unconvinced, "I, don't know if that's the word, but "I, I'm convinced that part of the reason she didn't go towards sports was because of her experience watching her mom on the sidelines. So when "I first started coaching, my husband and her used to sit behind my bench, and then they sat behind my bench and moved 10 rows. And then they went across from my bench, and then they went 10 more rows up, and finally they were 10 rows up on the other side, complete opposite of the gym. And this happened because they had a firsthand experience of listening to people in the stands, berate and cuss at their. Now as a coach you don't hear that stuff. You don't even, that stuff doesn't even bother you as a coach. You have thick enough skin, "I, it is what it is. But for an eight year old to listen to people berate her mother over a basketball game, she found really unsettling and, thinks that all of it is pretty silly, quite honestly. So, "I would, "I would just tell people, you know, coaches are, are human beings too. You, you have every right to, uh, disagree with what we do and, and how we do it. But you're impacting people besides, just the, the coach when you say those things, cuz honestly, it really doesn't affect the coaches. "I would just say oftentimes to parents, we spend a lot of time with your children breaking down film, analyzing scouts, uh, doing all the things that you need to do to prepare for a game if in an hour or two hours. Of viewing a game you feel like you know more than the people who are literally paid to do that job, then maybe you should throw your hat into the ring cuz there's some positions still available, uh, that you can make that happen.

Luke:

Yeah. And that, that's a powerful story and thank you for being open and honest about that, cuz people do get caught up in the competitiveness of the moment and forget that we are just human beings and our kids just see us as mom or dad. Although you see us as coach and you wanna criticize the things that we. They do forget about, as you say, the impact of the people around them, which we both agree. People are inherently good and "I just think that they, they lose that, right? They "I always am reminding my parents, I, Coach Merton's to you, but I'm dad to my kids. And, and please separate those two things, as frustrated as you are that we called that play. Don't forget that "I do have people in the stands. Love me and care for me and it really bothers them. So, thank you for bringing us back to that, human moment. And that's one thing that I've loved about following you on Twitter and studying you. And also coach Guth "I mean my daughters not play basketball, she play soccer. but man, "I would love for her to play for you guys to be honest with you. Cause "I love how you guys shape the whole person. And you used one adjective to describe Coach Gut and it was authentic. Why is authenticity so important in.

Marsha:

Wow. Um, you know, because it's, it's really a synonym for consistency. Um, if you, if you're not authentic as a human, it's really difficult to be consistent as a coach. you know, she her favorite quote, We lo we all love. She always says, We're gonna keep it a buck. We're gonna keep it 100. and we do because, for them to grow, they have to get to a level of authenticity. Um, you know, "I think as they're going through high school and well into college, they're, they're still trying to figure. Who they are and who they wanna be. And you know, "I often tell our young coaches, You know, you couldn't pay me to be back in my twenties. And now maybe in that shape, that would be phenomenal, but, um, and, and "I think there all, you know, people are always like, Really? You wouldn't wanna be in your twenties again? Nope, not at all. Because there is a level of confidence you gain as a coach when you gain that level of confidence as who you are as a person. and you can be very authentic and genuine then in your relationships because it's not a jocking. Of positioning on a coaching staff. Um, you know, "I think the nature of this profession is that even you, you know, coaches want to compete about everything, you know, and you're, you're told as a coach, like, you know, that coach wants to win at everything and that carries over to, to a coaching staff where you're competing within the very offices. Of, you know, a, a program and then have to go out and serve student athletes. That's a very different, difficult transition to make. So when you get to a level of authenticity where you know what you bring to the table, there isn't that competition. What you bring is not what "I bring and what he brings is not what she brings. And, I think Allison, Coach Guth has fostered that immensely. She was hi. She hired very, uh, deliberately. as far as the ages, the ranges, the backgrounds, and "I think for us, in particularly at Loyola Chicago, our student athletes feel that every single.

Luke:

"I. Love it. And. We were talking about is something that Coach Guth has mentioned on social media from studying you guys, and that is this is a quote, we teach both self-awareness and self-love and "I love that "I love both pieces, but self-awareness, "I think it's so important to know who you are as a human being and be confident in that. How do you intentionally teach self-awareness in your.

Marsha:

Yeah, "I mean, "I, "I. Think first of all, just delivering hard messages, in a thoughtful way. you know, "I, you know, over the years, even with my, I've got an 11 year old son. Uh, who plays sports and "I often have to tell him, Just listen to the message, not always the delivery. but "I. Think as a coach, you know, if you really wanna be the best you can be, you have to think about the delivery to, to say that you can say something, beneficial to a student athlete while you're screaming at them, while you're delivering FBOs or whatever. Expletive is your favorite of the day. I is, is comic. Of course they're gonna hear how it's being delivered. so "I think being very thoughtful in your delivery doesn't mean you can't raise your voice. Doesn't mean you can't be direct with them. But understanding, you know, if your ad walked down the hall to you and said, What the heck, you know, and started going off on you. Even though the message might be accurate, how is it being received? So "I, "I, think when you take a step back and realize delivery does indeed matter. and just again, being consistent in, okay, understanding this is your role, this is the role we need you to play in this. This was not what you did and, and here's why. And consistently backing it up and helping them understand "I think, awareness, is, is also understanding roles can change and your role can change. So be aware that as time goes on, as your status changes, as your development changes, uh, your role will change well as well. and keeping. Keeping a buck, as Allison would like to say, keeping it a buck with them on a daily basis of what that, role is gonna be in the future.

Luke:

Coach that is so true about how we deliver the message, and I'm always on my coaches about that because they do. Stop and all. I'm sorry. "I was, "I was caught up in the moment. "I was really passionate at that moment. I'm like, Would you want me to talk to you that way? and going back to what you said at the beginning of the, interview, no one wants to go out there and make a mistake and "I have to ram myself as a head coach. Same thing with my assistant coaches. "I, lay out my practice script. "I. Try to be as detailed "I can. And as you know, as a head coach, it takes a lot of time to plan a. Sometimes they go out and they may botch a segment. "I have to also remind myself as a head coach and deal with adults that they don't mean to make that mistake, So "I have to talk to them in a manner that "I, basically what I'm trying to say is "I try to model, Look how "I talk to you, coach to coach. Now think about how you talk coach to player because the relationship shouldn't be different. "I don't. You are an adult, the message to tone should, should be the same. It should be one out of respect and empathy. And that all comes from having relationship and understanding of the kids. So I, love all that. And, this has been a great interview. We're ready at the end of it. sign of a great episode as it goes really quickly. So hopefully it did for you as it as it did for me. I really enjoyed talking to you. "I mentioned, really enjoy following you on Twitter. You know, social media is what it is. "I, "I, "I just kind of finally accepted it about a year and a half ago as "I started studying it and realized that "I control the messaging. So now that "I do control it, "I, make sure to fill my day with coaches like. Who, uh, just want to make better people, and that's really what, this is about. And uh, as we're about to wrap up, "I know that your sister is a great coach as well, and I'm assuming that as you guys grew up, was probably a pretty competitive household. is it just by chance that you both became coaches or were your parents, teachers and coaches? H how did that.

Marsha:

No "I mean we were six kids and uh, four of us played division. "I "I actually had a younger sister who played at Iowa State and was briefly a coach as well. My brother played college baseball. no. And "I "I. Think the value, the things "I learned from my parents too. Very hardworking parents. Don't ever remember in all my years of playing my parents ever saying a word to us about coaching. Um, would never coach us, would never give us feedback after the games. Would never, we would never "I hear kids today say those really uncomfortable car rides. We'll catch parents after the game, berating their kids in the hallways, things like that. My parents never did any of that, and yet they put four kids in division, "I athletics. two more. Played n a "I a college basketball. They supported us. They loved us. they, you know, basically said, Keep going. they just, they were our cheerleaders. They were not our coaches and "I "I think we've taken a ton of value from that because now as we develop our own kids and, and our own student athletes, um, parents are a huge part. Of that and what the experience is gonna be. So as Coach Guth would often say, Love them tall. be their biggest fans, be their biggest cheerleaders. Um, you know, if you, if you choose wisely and put great coaches in front of 'em, they're, they're gonna take that burden off you as a parent and, uh, you can just be along for the ride and, and support them through the, the ups and downs of the whole.

Luke:

Well, I'm a big fan of what's going on at Loyola University Women's Basketball Program. I'm really excited to watch as you guys continue to grow the program. Again, for those of you do not follow Coach Freeze on Twitter. "I, recommend at Coach Freeze. I'll put that in the show notes as well. Not only is a great tidbits on billing the whole person, she also has a lot of drills that they do. So if you are a basketball coach at any level, there's a lot of great things that you could pick up that will enhance fundamentals and make your practice. More smoothly as well. So coach, uh, it was really great to meet you "I. Know you're bogged down in your season in recruiting, so "I really appreciate you coming on and "I. Hope you enjoyed this experience as much as "I do. And best of luck with the upcoming basketball season

Marsha:

Awesome. Thanks so much for having me, Luke. This was great.

Marsha Frese Profile Photo

Marsha Frese

Boasting over 20 years of coaching experience at the Division I level, Marsha Frese is set to begin her first season with the Loyola University Chicago women's basketball program. Frese, who was most recently on staff at San Diego State University, will serve as an assistant coach.

"I feel unbelievably fortunate to have an incredibly gifted veteran like Marsha joining our staff," Loyola head women's basketball coach Allison Guth said. "Coach Frese was one of my college coaches and the opportunity to get to work alongside her at this point in our careers is so special. Her breadth of knowledge, commitment to building meaningful relationships, and tremendous work ethic are what will benefit our program immediately. I am thrilled to welcome Marsha, her husband, Jason, and her children, Kylan and Camden, to our Rambler family."

"I'm ecstatic at the opportunity to join Coach Guth's staff at Loyola," Frese commented. "I've had a front-row seat watching Allison's career, having had the great fortune of coaching her at the University of Illinois. As a player, Allison was hardworking, enthusiastic, and a phenomenal teammate. It was clear early in her coaching career that Allison had the makings of an incredible head coach. Throughout her career, Allison has proven to be committed to developing the whole student-athlete, while building her teams to compete at the highest level. I'm so appreciative to be a part of what Allison is building at Loyola, and am excited to help carry out her championship vision for the Rambler program."

Prior to her time with the Aztecs, Frese spent five seasons as head coach at the University of Missouri - Kansas City, where she signed or coached four of the top 10 all-time scorers or rebounders in program history. The Roos also excelled in the classroom, posting the top team grade-point average in Division I in back-to-back seasons while also being ranked in the top 25 of the Women's Basketball Coaches Association (WBCA) Top 25 Honor Roll.

Frese made her way to Kansas City following stops at a pair of Mid-American Conference programs in Northern Illinois University and Ball State University. Before spending a pair of seasons as the associate head coach with the Huskies, Frese was part of the staff at Ball State that helped guide the Cardinals to a MAC West Division crown.

During a four-year stint at as the associate head coach at the University of Illinois from 2003-07 that briefly overlapped with Guth's collegiate career, Frese helped the Fighting Illini to three postseason appearances and assembled four recruiting classes that ranked in the top 25 nationally. She recruited and coached three of the program's four WNBA Draft picks, a quartet highlighted by Jenna Smith, who set all-time program records for scoring, rebounding, and blocked shots.

Frese broke into the collegiate coaching ranks in 1999-00, coaching under her sister, Brenda, as part of a first stint at Ball State that saw the duo pilot the Cardinals to back-to-back winning campaigns for just the second time in school history. The duo found their way to the University of Minnesota in 2001-02 season, orchestrating a 14-win improvement that included a 10-win increase in Big Ten Conference play. While in Minneapolis, Minn., Frese coached Big Ten Player of the Year Lindsey Whalen and Big Ten Freshman of the Year Janel McCarville, both of whom went on to be selected in the top five of the WNBA Draft. The Frese spent one final season on the bench together at the University of Maryland in 2002-03, signing a recruiting class that ranked in the top 10 in the nation and laid the foundation for the Terrapins run to the 2006 National Championship.

Named the state of Iowa's high school player of the year in 1990, Frese enjoyed a standout playing career at Rice University, where she still ranks third all-time in career field goal percentage (.402) and owns the number two mark on the single-season three-point field goal percentage record board (.472). She went on to earn a bachelor's degree in communications from the school.

Frese and her husband, Jason, are proud parents to two children, Kylan and Camden.